Fanmail: Apocalypse Wow

Mr. Rothfuss,

Last night I had the most kick-ass dream that I was living through the zombie apocalypse. In my dream, I saved Oot from zombies and brought him back to my house. Since it was the apocalypse, and night was coming, I was prepared to look after him indefinitely.

But just as the sun was setting, you knocked on my door. You had run across several states (in a mere evening), and you were shaggy, but gloriously so. You imperiously held out your hand, I returned Oot to you, and then you turned around and the two of you marched off into the sunset. The experience of being in your presence left me invincible against zombies for several days.

Needless to say, I was rather angry when I was woken up.

On a different note, if I were actually living through a zombie apocalypse, your books would be in my survival kit.

That is all,

Audrey

*     *     *

My name is Patrick Rothfuss, and I approve this message.

through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered....

P.S. Thanks for taking care of Oot for me.

That is all,

pat

This entry was posted in dreams, fanmail, I Am Your Spirit Animal, Nathan Taylor Art. By Pat36 Responses

36 Comments

  1. joker116
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 4:56 AM | Permalink

    Would the axe be your weapon of choice or does it serve for the “shaggy, but gloriously so” appearance?

  2. TheManiacWoodpecker
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 6:08 AM | Permalink

    That is not a mere axe. That is Snaga “The Sender” won by Pat in an epic Contest of Authors. In which they battled for days without food or rest for the Title “best Author in the known Universe”.
    Unspeakable are the heroic feats “Mighty Pat” had to perform to wrestle this Icon from the hands of those unworthy Authors who dared to denie “Glorious Pat” his well deserved title.
    But at long last “Manly Pat” defeated his opponents and wrestled Snaga from their dead hands and from this day on Snaga is the Sign of his Superiority among the Authors of Mount Awesomeness.

  3. ripshin
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 7:16 AM | Permalink

    This is one of my all time favorite posts. Thanks Pat! And thanks also to the invincible Audrey for sharing…wish the BFG would visit such awesomeness on me!

    rip

    • ripshin
      Posted March 19, 2013 at 7:18 AM | Permalink

      …though, as I think about it, I believe I would prefer to “rescue” the lovely Sarah…I’m just saying… ;)

  4. ItIsNotAnIsland
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 7:17 AM | Permalink

    I have to say that your books would definitely be in my apocalypse survival kit too! Also, I really hope that in the picture Oot’s left-hand pinky is just curled inside his hand and not eaten by a bunch of hungry zombies…

  5. Posted March 19, 2013 at 8:42 AM | Permalink

    Lol…. seriously, a lengthy rolling chortle ensued from reading this post. It’s totally changed my attitude too, as I was just noticing how bad of a mood I was in (while making a post somewhere else).

    Sure wise I could remember dreams… and then have one like this. :D

  6. Posted March 19, 2013 at 8:53 AM | Permalink

    There are some serious levels of badassity coming from this blog. I can’t look directly at it because of the bright light, must squint eyes and tilt head to the side…

  7. Posted March 19, 2013 at 9:12 AM | Permalink

    I’m assuming that bracer on your arm is a pewter metalmind used in emergencies to draw enough strength to rip zombies in half.

    • ItIsNotAnIsland
      Posted March 19, 2013 at 10:07 AM | Permalink

      Pat is a feruchemist? His awesomeness just leveled up!

  8. Prufrock
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 11:12 AM | Permalink

    Puppet filled the doorway, his dark robe striking against the warm candlelight behind him. He was hooded now, with his arms upraised. The long sleeves of his robes caught the inrush of air and billowed impressively. The same rush of air caught his hood and blew it partway off his head.
    “Damn,” he said in a distracted voice. The hood settled half on, half off his head, partially covering one eye. He kicked the door shut again.

    This is all I could think of when I saw the picture. Perhaps there’s something wrong here.

  9. Posted March 19, 2013 at 11:35 AM | Permalink

    Who do we credit the epic artwork too?

    LOL – I think you should do more awesome artwork to match fan letters, that was hilarious.

    Also – Audrey, no more Walking Dead before you go to sleep. :P

  10. Posted March 19, 2013 at 11:59 AM | Permalink

    I am not adequately equipped to handle the sheer volume of awesomeness in this post.

  11. draccus.dingle
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 12:54 PM | Permalink

    Apocalypse schmocalypse…let the rain of free books and such begin. Lottery!, lottery!, lottery!…

  12. Wren
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 1:23 PM | Permalink

    That is clearly the first panel in what will be an ongoing comic series featuring Pat and Oot traveling a dystopian landscape, a la Kung Fu but with more zombies.

    They will have many adventures and teach many lessons, spreading justice one town at a time. (Oot will of course break out some truly impressive martial arts at a crucial moment)

    • Posted March 20, 2013 at 6:51 PM | Permalink

      ” traveling a dystopian landscape, a la Kung Fu Lone Wolf & Cub but with more zombies.”

      Fixed that for you. {g}

  13. murillo
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 2:43 PM | Permalink

    “The funniest author of the moment” Murillo Felix

    This could be in your next book since the time it be launched i will become very famous!

  14. Kashiraja
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 2:44 PM | Permalink

    hahaha. Snaga is awesome

  15. Jsherry
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 3:09 PM | Permalink

    To be clear, are we adding Pat’s books to the survival kit for long-term entertainment, or as Zombie-bashing Blunt Melee Weapons? If the latter, I’m now torn, because this volume of Memory of Light I’m finally reading is reaaaaallly hefty. One book to go: your move, Rothfuss.

  16. cageo
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 3:29 PM | Permalink

    This made my morning, thank you! Is that a mane of underarm hair exploded from one sleeve? Shaggy indeed haha

  17. jasperflint
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 5:03 PM | Permalink

    I really hope more things are tagged with “I am your spirit animal”

    • Posted March 19, 2013 at 5:33 PM | Permalink

      LOL!

      +1

      I totally agree. Didn’t even notice that the first time I swung by here. So now this blog is twice as amusing.

  18. NAMDORG
    Posted March 19, 2013 at 8:40 PM | Permalink

    New desktop wallpaper.

  19. blueforce
    Posted March 20, 2013 at 8:06 AM | Permalink

    SO. MUCH. WIN

  20. farleykj
    Posted March 20, 2013 at 6:47 PM | Permalink

    It’s a well worn comment that “no one wants to hear about your dreams”. Oh, really? In your face, anti-dream commentors. Ha.

  21. loki
    Posted March 20, 2013 at 9:48 PM | Permalink

    Looking pretty lean Pat.

  22. claymorewit
    Posted March 21, 2013 at 1:16 AM | Permalink

    I can understand why she would put Name of the Wind in her zombie survival kit. As everyone of the true faith knows, this is one of the seven holy books of the Church of Whedon. Nothing could repel a zombie more powerfully, except perhaps an apache helicopter or a literary award battle axe. Whedon be praised!

  23. shinla
    Posted March 27, 2013 at 11:03 AM | Permalink

    It took me some time to figure out who is Oot. That is excellent drawing I must say. I have upped my kickstarter pledge amount several notches up in hope to bring you just 0.0001 inch closer to Torment 2, if that is all that I am capable of. This world deserves a better class of storytellers.

  24. shinla
    Posted March 27, 2013 at 11:05 AM | Permalink

    Oh and I know you will hate me for this but… I can’t stop scratching my head if I don’t say it: Will you ever come to Singapore? ;)

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