Category Archives: appearances

Published: June 4, 2009

Penicillin and Bruce Campbell

About a year ago, I noticed that whenever I do a big signing or a convention with a lot of panels, I end up getting sick as a dog afterwards.

So I started being more careful. I made a point of eating healthy while I’m there. I drink plenty of water and juice. I take vitamins and a zinc supplement. I wash my hands so often it looks like I’m channeling the spirit of Howard Hughes.

And it doesn’t make a damn bit of difference. As soon as the convention or signing is over, I get sick. I might as well tongue-kiss everyone I meet at a convention. That way I’d at least feel like I deserved to get sick. Plus the pictures people posted on facebook would be *way* more interesting. Plus kissing is awesome.

What was I talking about?

Oh yeah. My sickness. It turns out I wasn’t just being a big sissy baby. I didn’t have swine flu, but I did have strep throat. That makes me feel a little better about the fact that I’ve spent the last week weeping like a little girl and doing shots of chloraseptic like a fratboy on a bet.

*Sigh* You know what sucks about being an experienced writer? The internal editor. Ten years about I would have written that last sentence and moved on with my life whistling merrily.

But now when I write it, I think:

  • This reinforces our negative cultural stereotype that implies women are weak and weepy.
  • This implies that all frat boys are clueless drunken fuck-ups.
  • If I write this, a half dozen people will leave comments saying, “I was the proud member of Epsilon Ometa Whateverthefuck fraternity in college. Not all of us are drunken idiots. My brothers and I maintained a 3.8 GPA, drank nothing but rainwater, and raised money for crippled kittens.”

And then I sigh.

Of course, nobody will write in about the subtler, implied slur against women. Which makes me feel worse in some ways.

Don’t get me wrong, the internal editor is a useful thing. It keeps me from getting in trouble. (Sometimes.) It makes me a better writer. It makes me a better human being.

But still, it’s a shame. “Weeping like a little girl” is a lovely phrase. It really gets my point across. It conveys. And when you apply it to some great hairy bear of a man like me, it’s got all sorts of humorous implications.

The same is true with the stereotype of the drunk sideways-cap wearing frat boy. It’s a funny thing. It’s a useful tool for humor.

The other obvious problem is that it takes so much more time to be a careful writer. Take today’s post, for example. I was going to talk about being sick, or about my foreign taxi adventures, or about how great it is to be back home.

And what am I doing instead? Writing a blog about writing a blog. Merciful Buddha forgive me. It makes me long for the days when I was just a punk kid and wrote whatever the hell amused me with no thought for the repercussions.

Well, I promised myself I’d only spend an hour on today’s blog. Taxi adventures and other musings will have to wait for a day or so…

Just to give this blog some shred of substance that isn’t all meta, I should mention that this weekend I’ll be at Florida Supercon in Miami where I plan on gazing adoringly at Bruce Campbell’s magnificently sculptured ass.

I’ll also be doing a reading, signing books, and all the rest of the usual stuff that I do when I’m Guest of Honor at a convention.

And don’t worry, I’m on antibiotics now, so you won’t catch strep off me.

pat

Also posted in BJ Hiorns Art, the craft of writing | By Pat62 Responses
Published: May 21, 2009

Signing In Taunton..

Sorry for the delay getting this information to you, but here’s the information about the signing in Taunton on the 26th.

I’ll be signing books and hanging out in the store from 1:00 until 3:00 in the afternoon. Then, for anyone who’s interested, we’ll wander off and find a place to hang out and talk. I’ll answer questions, and maybe do a bit of informal reading. Maybe something from book two…

Here’s the info for the Waterstones in Tauton, I think:

The County Hotel, East Street
GB – Taunton TA1 3LU
Tel: 01823 333 113

Gotta Run, I’ve got my Forbidden signing in 10 minutes…

pat

Also posted in foreign happenings, signing books | By Pat36 Responses
Published: May 5, 2009

Signings in Rome and Amsterdam.

Okay folks, I’ve got the first round of foreign book signings organized.

First off, we’ve got two in Rome:

Location: Le Storie
Date: Saturday, May 9, 2009
Time: 6:00pm – 7:00pm
Street: Via Giulio Rocco, 37/39
City: Rome

Here’s the link to the appropriate facebook event, if you’re into that sort of thing.
And a link to Le Storie bookshop.


Location: Fanucci Bookshop
Date: Sunday, May 10, 2009
Time: 6:00pm – 7:00pm
Street: Piazza Madama, 8
City: Rome

Here’s the facebook event.

Then we’ve got one in Amsterdam.

Location: American Book Center – ABC Amsterdam
Date: Thursday, May 14, 2009
Time: 6:30pm – 8:30pm
Street: Spui 12, 1012 XA
City: Amsterdam, Netherlands

Here’s the link to ABC bookstore.
And the facebook event.

In Amsterdam, because more of the locals speak English, I’ll actually be doing a little bit of a reading, then a Q&A session before I sign books. I love doing Q&A.

Even better, my Dutch translator will be be making an appearance at this signing too. Lia Belt was my very first translator. Not only did she really hold my hand through the process, but she helped me understand a lot of the dangers of translation. It’s because of her that I’ve made a point of getting in touch with all my other translators since then, trying my best to work with them so as little is lost in translation as possible.

So I’m excited to meet her. I’ve invited her along to sign books too. After all, the Dutch version is more than half hers, and it’s always seemed like a shame that translators don’t get more credit for the work they do.

Edit: Additional: my Italian translator will be around during the Saturday signing in Rome.

Anyway, those are the first three signings we have planned. If you know anyone that might be interested, you’d be doing me a great favor if you passed the information along to them. We’re setting these things up pretty quickly, so there isn’t much time for word to spread.

(This illustration has nothing to do with a book signing.
I’ve merely inserted it here to confuse you.)

Despite the cool cover, I won’t be doing any public signings in Paris. It’s just too early. The book hasn’t been out long enough there for people to want to show up for that sort of thing. And if there’s one thing more depressing than sitting in a bookstore for two hours while everyone tries to avoid eye contact (As was the case in many of my early US signings) it’s sitting around in a bookstore in Paris while people avoid making eye contact.

And for those of you in England, fret not. Things are in the works. Fabulous things. We’ll have at least one in London, and hopefully a few more scattered around the rest of the country.

I’ll post details as soon as those plans firm up. Soon.

Best,

pat

Also posted in BJ Hiorns Art, foreign happenings, signing books, translation | By Pat42 Responses
Published: April 23, 2009

A Love Note to Germany (And Other Things)

Okay. There’s been a flurry of excited messaging ever since I mentioned I’d be making a trip to Europe, and was willing to sign books while I’m over there. Details are over here on the previous blog.

Here are a few general comments and some answers to questions in response to the hubbub.

To my German Readers:

Oh my German readers. I do love you. I love you with a fierce love that is big as the sky. I know there are many of you. I know you would like me to stop in your country and sign books and do various authory things.

Do not think that I scorn you. Do not think that I neglect you. Do not think I fail to appreciate you, because I do. It is because of you that I can now legitimately call myself “International Bestselling Author” Patrick Rothfuss.

Before that, I was forced to call myself merely “Skilled Lover of Women” Patrick Rothfuss or “That Strange Guy Who Sits in the Back of the Coffeeshop All the Time” Patrick Rothfuss.

I appreciate this. You must believe me. I love you.

But as for making a stop in Germany this time around. I just don’t think I’m going to be able to.

You see, Sarah, she says. “I would like to go to Rome.”

And I think, “Rome? Have they done five hardcover printings of my book in Rome? No. That was Germany. Did my book get all manner of cool reviews in Rome? No. That also was Germany. What of the swank little bookmark? Surely that was Rome? No. It was not.”

But you see, Sarah, she has this baby in her. This baby gives her remarkable powers.

I say to Sarah, “Where would you like to go on your trip to Europe?

Sarah says, “I would like to go to Rome.”

And lo. We go to Rome.

Sarah says, “Also, I would like to see Paris.”

And suddenly, it is so.

I’m not saying I’ll never visit you, Germany. I will. I promise. It’s just that when I do visit, I want everything to be perfect. I don’t want to rush this part of our relationship. I don’t want to go too fast. We need to be sure we’re both ready. I want this to be special for both of us.

Perhaps I’ll come to visit when book two is translated. Or maybe when your paperback comes out. Hopefully, if the German publishers are willing to help, we can do it up proper and I’ll hit a bunch of places all over Germany, rather than just making a two-day stop in one city.

Be patient, I love you.

Sincerely,

pat

To my readers in Dublin:

As above. I was really hoping to make it there during this trip, but it just didn’t work out. You’ll see me before too long. I promise.

To my readers in other countries:

I would love to come to Sweden. To Ireland. To Spain. To Belgium. To Estonia. To Finland. I would love to come to Russia. To the Czech Republic. To Turkey. To Wales. To Portugal….

I’m sure you can see the problem.

If you can’t see the problem, it’s this: if I went to all of these countries, I wouldn’t have time to do anything but drive around. I wouldn’t see anything except through the window of a train. It’s pure logistics. I can’t do it all this trip. Someday. Hopefully.

To people eager to help schedule a signing:

1. If you want your local bookstore to host a signing, you need to tell *them* you’re excited about it, not me. I’m already interested in doing a signing. So are you. We’re on the same page. We’ve established a rapport.

But without the bookstore it’s just not going to work out. It’s like a three-way. It doesn’t matter how much you and me want it. Without that third person, it just doesn’t work out.

2. If you have a friend/relative/lover/former roommate that works in a bookstore, and you think they’d be excited to help schedule a signing. Contact *them* about it, see if they’re really interested, then have them drop me a line if they are.

3. If you want to contact me about a potential signing, use the contact form. If you post it in the comments, I won’t know how to get in contact with you. I will be similarly helpless if you shout the information out your window, or write it on your bathroom mirror. Sad but true.

4. If your town isn’t on the list of places I’m stopping, I probably won’t be able to come out and do a signing. The possible exception to this is Manchester, as it’s on my way between London and Edinburgh. But even that depends on the interest of the local bookstore. (See #1)

That said, if you’re actually one of the folks in charge of scheduling events in a bookstore or a library, and you’d REALLY like me to stop in, you can still drop me a line.

A few quick answers:

Q: “Will I be posting up the dates, times, and places of the eventual signings?”

A: Um… Yes? Rest assured. I’ll be posting them here on the blog, and on the Tour Schedule Page.

Q: “How’s the book going?”

A: Very well. Don’t bug me about it. It harshes my vibe.

Q: “Does Sarah have any news about the baby?”

A: I just asked her. Sarah says: “It’s freaking huge.”

Q: “I live in a town in Europe! We have a bookstore! You should come here!”

A: That is not a question. Also, please see above points one through four inclusive.

Hugs and kisses,

pat

Also posted in BJ Hiorns Art, foreign happenings, Sarah, signing books, travel abroad | By Pat72 Responses
Published: April 17, 2009

European Tour – a call for bookstores.

First: My Thanks

Thanks to everyone who offered their congratulations.

(I’d be more properly verbose and flowery, but I have to be brief here. I’m using borrowed internet up here in the northwoods of Wisconsin, and this place is closing in 15 minutes.)

Second: The Tour

A while back, I promised Sarah a trip to Europe. Now, with the baby coming, I’m realizing I’m going to have to either make good on that promise, or wait for years until we no longer have a newborn. Because dragging a newborn around an international trip is not cool on many levels.

So we’re going. Sarah deserves her trip for putting up with my endless bullshit.

Soon I will be turning over a solid draft of my book for my editor to read and… well… edit. This will take her a while, because the book is beastly long and she’s good at her job.

While she’s doing that, I have a window of opportunity. Rather than sit around, twiddle my thumbs, and fret over what my editor will say, I’m going to take Sarah to Europe before she gets too big with baby to do more than waddle to the fridge and make me rub her feet.

I’m looking forward to the trip. It will do me good to take a break from the book for a bit. If I don’t get a few weeks away from it in between drafts, I lose perspective.

Also, it will be nice to have a bit of a walkabout on my own before finalizing Kvothe’s own set of adventure as he goes out to make his fortune in the wide world.

Third: Sending out the Call.

For years now, I’ve had folks in the UK and the rest of Europe saying things like, “When are you going to be coming to [insert name of foreign country here]??!!?”

Well now’s the time.

I’m more that willing to do signings at the cities I’m stopping at. But since this is happening on the spur of the moment, I don’t have time to go through official bookstore channels, or perform the typical courting dances with foreign bookstores: first researching, then calling around, then playing phone tag, then trying to convince them that it would be worth their while to order a dozen of my books and set up a card table….

By the time I finished that, I’d already be back in the US.

So here’s where you come in.

I’m posting my itinerary below. What cities I’ll be and where. If you own a bookstore (or work in one) and you’d like me to come in and do a signing, lovely. Drop me a message off the contact form and we’ll set something up.

If you don’t work in a bookstore, but you know a cool one you think would be interested, ask them if they might be interested. Then, if they are, drop me a message. Or have them do it.

May 8-11 Rome

May 13-15 Amsterdam

May 17-19 Paris

May 21-25 London (And environs.)

May 27– 28 Edinburgh

May 30 Glasgow

Crap crap crap. The place is closing.

More later,

Fondly,

pat

Also posted in Sarah, signing books, travel abroad | By Pat128 Responses
Published: April 8, 2009

Upcoming appearances, and the woes of biography

I have trouble with simple things sometimes.

For example: I’m going to be Guest of Honor at Gencon this year.

That isn’t the hard part. Truth is, being Guest of Honor is a pretty sweet gig. I had my first taste of it up in V-Con last year.

When you’re GOH, the convention typically does lovely things for you, like pay for your hotel room and your flight out to the convention. Usually an author has to pay for all that out of their own pocket, which means it’s really expensive to hit two or three cons in a year. Let alone the five or six I usually try to attend.

This year, through a weird confluence of events, I’m going to be Guest-of-Honoring at four different conventions. Details are over on the Tour Page, if you’re interested.

One of these conventions is only a couple of weeks away, down in Madison. I’m sorry I haven’t posted up the info about Oddcon sooner, but I’ve been busy writing, and I was called in as a last minute pinch-hitter GOH to replace Tobias Buckell. He had to bow out on account of his wife being super-pregnant. If you’re interested, they’ve extended pre-registration until Friday because of the change of plans.

Anyway, in exchange for having our expenses paid, the GOH has certain responsibilities. The main one of these is to do stuff for the convention. We do more than the usual number of readings, signings, panels. Etc.

I don’t have a problem with this. This is why I go to conventions. I like talking about stories. That’s what I’m all about.

My problem was with something much simpler. As I mentioned above, I’m going to be the author GOH at Gencon this year. So they asked me to write a bio they can put in the program book….

This should be easy. It’s short. 150 words. When I was born. Where I’m from. What I’ve done. Stuff like that.

But I overthink these things. It’s a problem I have.

So I write a regular bio. Names. Dates. The Name of the Wind. Sold in 27 countries. Simple.

But then when I’m finished, I read that bio and it seems really dry and boring.

So I write a new bio. I want it to be better. Different. A little funny. I want it to be cool. Sexy even.

But then I read that one and it seems desperate, whorish. It’s stupid and corny.

So I write a new bio. I tone it down, try to be subtle, understated, professional.

But then I read that one and it seems boring again, plus stiff and awkward. Plus fakey.

So, finally, I get fed up and write something like this:

Patrick Rothfuss sprung fully formed from Marge Rothfuss, his mother, in Madison Wisconsin. In a mere three months, Pat grew to the height of a man while teaching himself to read and write using only a shovel and a dead cat.

When the voices told him to, Pat left home to attend college in at University Wisconsin Stevens Point where he joined Slytherin house and had many wonderful adventures. After graduating, Pat evolved into a being of pure light and energy. Then he went to grad school and evolved even further into being composed entirely of bile, anger, binder twine, and sweet, sweet, methadone. After grad school Pat joined forces with five plucky Japanese schoolgirls to form a giant robot that fights crime.

Through all of this Pat has read fantasy, watched fantasy, and written fantasy. Some academics have suggested that Pat eats, sleeps, and breathes fantasy, but this is simply untrue. The truth is that Pat eats burritos, sleeps like a drooly baby, and breathes a white-hot plasma composed of molten gold and rage.

And you know what? I like this bio the best. If I’m going to spew out bullshit, I’d rather have it be pure, unadulterated bullshit.

By the way, a lot of you have been asking who’s been doing my illustrations for the blog. It’s not me. I can’t draw worth a tinker’s damn. My illustrator’s name is Brett Hiorns, and he is awesome. You can say howdy to him in the comments, if you like.

That’s all I’ve got for now. More news soon. Cool news. Stay tuned.

pat

Also posted in BJ Hiorns Art, conventions, my dumbness | By Pat93 Responses
Published: February 17, 2009

My Trip to LA: Part Two

Just a reminder folks. This is part two of a longer blog. Part one is over here.

[…]

I’ve had the chance to hang out with some pretty cool people over the last year: Peter S. Beagle, Tad Williams, Neil Gaiman. Folks I’ve idolized for a long time. But I never had this strange vertigo with any of them.

I’ve thought about it a lot since then, and right now my best guess is this.

I think talking to someone you’ve seen on TV is like meeting someone you already know. Your brain has become familiar with the image of this person, you know the texture of their voice, their body posture. For all intents and purposes, you know them.

Except you don’t. You’re just familiarized to the sensation of them. What’s more disorienting is that if they’re an actor, the personality you’ve attached to their image isn’t really their own. Or at least it’s not *entirely* their own.

I don’t think it’s the same with writers. When you’re experiencing our work, you don’t see our faces. You might get a peek inside our heads (or think you get a peek) but that doesn’t lead to the same visual imprinting that you get from watching someone on screen.

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve probably watched Dr. Horrible over a hundred times since it came out. I haven’t watched The Guild *quite* as much as that, but if you count the times I’ve re-watched each of the individual episodes, I’ve probably moved into the triple digits by now.

This means that in the last year, I’ve seen Felicia Day’s face more than I’ve seen the face of my own sister. More than I’ve seen the faces of any of my friends who all live out of town. More than any real-world face except Sarah’s, and honestly, during the week when Dr. Horrible was first released, that particular race might have been too close to call.

I think that’s what where this strange vertigo came from. It was some rational part of me hitting my the degauss button in my brain again and again. Helping me realize that the person in front of me was fundamentally different from the person I had been watching on the screen of my computer.

And eventually it worked. I was able to settle down and talk with her and the moments of odd vertigo grew farther and farther apart. Unfortunately one of those moments happened when I was signing a book for her. A signing that I screwed up to a degree that still embarrasses me.

I also have to say that I was really impressed with everyone else at the signing. I know a lot of people must have recognized her, but from what I saw, nobody freaked out on her or hassled her.

Part of this I’m guessing has to do with the fact that we were in LA, but I’m willing to lay a lot of it on the fact that my readership seems to be composed of very cool, intelligent people.

For example, when I was signing books after the reading, a couple folks came up to the front of the line, and thanked me for introducing them to Dr. Horrible on my blog.

I motioned them a little closer and they leaned in. “Be cool about it,” I said quietly, excited to get the chance to tell someone who could appreciate the news. “But Felicia Day is here. She’s behind you, standing in line!” I grinned, vibrating with geeky joy. Probably looking like a garden gnome who has recently stumbled onto the a particularly interesting patch of mushrooms.

“We know!” They grinned too, just as excited as me.

After the signing, the lot of us went out to dinner: me, my gracious hosts, a few of their friends, and Felicia day.

We ended up at a small restaurant, where I had the best Thai food of my life. And I must say, sitting there, surrounded by rocket scientists, librarians, and other persons of eclectic occupation. Chatting and trading stories with Felicia day. It was my own personal Valhalla.

Lastly, since we’re talking about public appearances, I’m going to be having a little reading up here in Hayward in a week or so.

So if you live up here in the north woods of Wisconsin and are not an elk, feel free to swing by. It should be a nice cozy event with just a few of us, so I’ll have plenty of time to chat with everyone who comes. Plus, I hear there will be cookies.

February 26th, Thursday, 6:00-8:00

Hayward Public Library
10788 HWY 27/77
Hayward, WI 54843

For more info call 715-634-2161

And back to work for me,

pat

Also posted in BJ Hiorns Art, fan coolness, Felicia Day, meeting famous people | By Pat68 Responses

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