Suvudu Cage Match: Felurian vs Death

Last month I made a blog post about Felurian being in the Suvudu cage match this year. Since then, she’s defeated Johana Mason and Sabriel.

Last week’s match up was against Susan Sto-Helit from Discworld. The voting was pretty insane, and for the vast majority of the time it was closer than a percentage point.

Cage Match2

(A lot of times the gap was was less than two-tenths of a percent.)

In my first blog, I mentioned that I wanted to write the scene where Felurian went up against Death. But honestly, the more I thought of it, the more I appreciated the thought of Felurian going up against Susan, Death’s granddaughter.

I knew I could probably win the match by posting about it on social media, but I wanted to see who would win the vote without my interference. If I won, I wanted to it to be an honest victory.

Days passed, the voting went back and forth. Then I had an idea. Several ideas. Several ideas that fit together in an interesting way.

The technical term for this series of interlocking ideas is called “Story.”

But to write that story, I had to be in control of things, so I made a Facebook post letting people know we only had a few hours, and that I knew what I wanted to write. Suddenly, things changed.  And by the next morning…


So I won by brute force. But I got to have my way. I now had the right to write the final match.

But to do that, I needed to write the Felurian Vs. Susan match so that it turned out the way I wanted it. It’s a prolouge to the final match.

And here it is:

*     *     *

Imagine, if you will, nothing. An endless expanse of void. A swath of blackness that cannot help but boggle the mind with how huge and cold and empty it is.

Now, in this vasty nothing, imagine a turtle. It moves through the emptiness with slow grace. A lonely swimmer in an endless star-flecked sea.

Atop that turtle’s ancient, comet-pocked shell stand four elephants. They are huge as moons. On their broad and patient backs they carry an entire world.

These things exist. They are as real as you and I. In many ways, they are more real.

Atop the elephants’ backs rests a world that is flat and round as a disc. All round its edge oceans pour endlessly out into the empty dark of space.

It is magic that renews the endlessly falling oceans. But it is science that catches the tumbling water, fans it out. It forms droplets. It evaporates. Sublimates.

It’s here, where science and magic rub shoulders with each other that something ordinary and wonderful happens. The slow, heavy sunlight of this unlikely world touches the falling water. And this world, these elephants, this turtle, (whose name is A’Tuin) are all gilded with a crown of rainbows.

This is just as it should be. It has always been this way. It will always be this way.

*     *     *

It was night on the surface of the Discworld. Under the stars there was a hill, on the hill, a clearing, and in the clearing, a single standing stone.

The hill wasn’t particularly remarkable, neither was the clearing. The standing stone was remarkable, but only so long as the remark was something along the lines of, “Why can’t I count that stone when it’s obviously the only stone there?”

Aside from this, there was nothing particularly noteworthy about this time or place. The crescent moon provided a thin, silvery light. It hung slender in the sky, just above the horizon. That, at least, lent a bit of drama to the scene. It was a nice effect, if you went in for that sort of thing.

Susan Sto Helit stood at the edge of the clearing. She did not go in for this sort of thing. She had been standing there for the better part of an hour, half-hidden in the shadows. Her feet hurt, and the moon was increasingly irritating to her.

It was, she had decided, a little too slender, a little too foreboding. It hung the perfect distance off the horizon. Nice enough at first glance, but when you spent some time looking at it, you couldn’t help but feel like it was trying a little too hard.

It was a portentous moon. It was perilously close to being mythic. You couldn’t trust a moon like that….

*     *     *

Felurian stepped out from behind the standing stone and walked into the clearing. She was pale and slender. Her hair was long and dark, and it fell as sharply as a shadow or a knife.

You could say she was skyclad. That is the sort of thing that people tend to say. But perhaps it would be better to say that she was as naked as the moon, and just as bashful, which is to say she seemed perfectly comfortable where she was, as she was. She stood in the clearing as if she owned it, as if it were her home.

Susan stepped out of the shadows at the edge of the trees and walked to meet her. She wore a long dress and sensible boots. Her hair was pulled back tight against her head. The white of it shone silver in the moonlight, save for a single stripe of black. She carried a fireplace poker loosely in one hand, the dark iron of it almost invisible against the dark of the night.

Felurian nodded to Susan politely. “you received My message,” she said. Her voice oddly muted, oddly soft, but clear, as if spoken close to Susan’s ear. “and you have come. My thanks.”

“I have,” Susan said. “Though why you would pick this place is beyond me. It’s the end of nowhere.”

Felurian gave an odd smile, her head tilting to one side, “what are time and space to creatures such as you and I?”

Susan pursed her lips at this, as if she wanted to take issue with the word creature, then let it pass. She sighed instead. “Very well. If we’re going to fight, let’s get it over with. It’s chilly out, and I have a class to teach tomorrow morning.”

Felurian gently shook her head, her long hair spilling over one shoulder as she did so. “that is not what I came for,” she said. “that is not what I desire.”

Susan gave an indelicate sniff at that. “I am not here for your desire,” she said with a bit of an edge to her voice.

It was quiet for a moment in the clearing. Felurian’s dark eyes narrowed briefly before she spoke again. “I have heard tell of you,” she said, her tone slow and measured.  “it is said you have a knack for seeing truth beneath the surface of a thing.”

Susan’s head lifted a little at that. Her expression wasn’t proud, exactly. But there was something close to pride there. A self-certainty as hard and practical as… well, as a fireplace poker. “I do,” she said.

“and thus I come to you.” Felurian said, “I leave the safety of my forest glade. I come before you all unarmed and unafraid.”

“And naked.”

Felurian looked down at herself, then up again, her expression blithe. “even so,” she said politely, as if Susan had made a particularly dull observation about the weather. “is that all that you can see? is what I heard so wrong?”

Susan felt her face go hot at the reproach.

“if you have skill at seeing, look at Me,” Felurian said, spreading her arms wide to her sides. “am I some tawdry thing? am I a beast consumed with nothing more than lust? am I mere brightness with no spark beneath?”

Susan’s expression grew serious, and she went still. No… it wasn’t that she was motionless. It’s more that she seemed to be more present than before. As if she were more there. As if, compared to her, nothing else was quite real.

She turned to look at Felurian, her eyes like distant stars. “NO,” she said thoughtfully. “YOU ARE MUCH MORE THAN THAT.””indeed,” Felurian said. If she were at all discomfited by the change that had come over Susan she did not show it. “if it were mere advantage that I sought, there are many things I could have brought. I could pull the very sky around me like a mantle and grasp the crescent moon as if it were a sickle blade.”

Susan watched as Felurian spoke in her gentle, edgeless voice. She said the words without any particular emphasis. Without any threat or menace. Honestly, Susan would have preferred if the faerie woman had put a little thunder in her voice. She knew what to do when mythic creatures started grandstanding. Nine times out of ten a ding round the ear with a poker set everything to rights, and most of the rest you could safely ignore.

“so.” Felurian’s tone was infuriating, and it took Susan a moment to realize why. It was the same tone Susan herself used with her students when they were being particularly slow. “what do you see? why would I come thus to your lands? all unadorned with nothing in my hands?”

Susan drew a breath and let it out again. Pushing her irritation aside, the answer was blindingly clear. “Because you are not here to fight,” she said. She did not say the rest of what she thought: Because you are not afraid of me.

“just so,” Felurian said, smiling.

Susan looked down at the iron poker in her hand, feeling oddly embarrassed for bringing it along. She almost tossed it aside, then stopped herself. There was a big difference between feeling foolish and being a fool. “What are you here for then, if not to fight?” she asked.

“discourse,” Felurian said with a playful smile. “if we two fight, there will be a victor, and the victor will move on to fight the lady Death.”

“I know a few things about death,” Susan said dryly.

“Then you know it will not be an easy fight for either of us to win,” Felurian said.

Susan looked for a moment as if she might protest, then she seemed to think better of it and nodded instead.

“there is a different way,” Felurian said. “it is my area of expertise.”

Susan bit back her first response to this. “And what expertise is that?” she asked, doing her best to keep the sarcasm out of her voice.

Felurian smiled then for the first time. A wide, delighted smile. It was white and sharp and slender as the moon.

“partnership,” Felurian said.

*     *     *

First off, can I just mention how absolutely terrifying it was to write something like this?

I’ve been sweating blood over these two scenes for almost a week now. When I first thought of the idea for this story, I thought it would be fun. And honestly, it was fun. But it was also amazingly nerve-wracking. Writing something that even lightly touches Pratchett and Gaiman’s work and worlds… I feel like a little kid putting on his daddy’s shoes and clomping around the house.

But it was fun. It’s something I probably never would have dared if the timing had turned out differently and Terry Pratchett hadn’t passed away recently. I hope people realize I don’t write this lightly, or with anything resembling mockery. Writing these was an act of love, and therefore terrifying and embarassing in various degrees.

To see the second, somewhat longer piece, you can head over to the Suvudu website. And after you read it, you can vote on who you think should be the final winner.

Later everyone,


This entry was posted in appearances, fanfic. By Pat107 Responses


  1. TheManiacWoodpecker
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 3:35 PM | Permalink

    Great Prologue Pat :-) but is it just me being lightning fast or is there no rest on the suvudu page?

    • Posted April 4, 2015 at 3:42 PM | Permalink

      You are lightning fast.

      the rest will be posted up very shortly. I just finished writing it today, and sent it to them about 20 minutes ago…

  2. arachnid
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 3:46 PM | Permalink

    You do a very good Pratchett, Pat.

    The remainder of the story doesn’t seem to be there, though. Hopefully it will show up soon.

    • Posted April 4, 2015 at 3:59 PM | Permalink

      It’s up now….

      • arachnid
        Posted April 4, 2015 at 5:13 PM | Permalink

        Wonderfully written. I’ve been wondering if you’d write anything about the passing of, um, Susan’s great grandfather. This was more than appropriate.

  3. Epidilius
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 4:02 PM | Permalink

    The story on Suvudu was really well done. Your homage to Terry Pratchett wonderful.

  4. Holmelund
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 4:15 PM | Permalink

    Gods you are brilliant.

  5. Posted April 4, 2015 at 4:25 PM | Permalink

    Fantastic. I would pay a moderate sum of money to hear that read by Mr. Gaiman or yourself.
    Also, made me tear up a bit at there. Unexpected but amazing.

  6. Sandhya
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 4:43 PM | Permalink

    Can’t love you anymore….

    • Sandhya
      Posted April 4, 2015 at 4:47 PM | Permalink

      Wait! You understand that I mean I love you so much already….. I have to laugh. When I stalked you at ECCC Saturday and then finally went up to talk with you, I became such a fan girl (I am 69 years old) that I could hardly explain how I felt about The Slow Regard of Silent Things. You make me stupid!

      • Posted April 5, 2015 at 2:16 AM | Permalink

        Oh. I remember you. (You weren’t stupid.) I just now put together this name and the person that came up and said hello at the convention.

        *Waves* Nice to meet you (again.)

        • Sandhya
          Posted April 5, 2015 at 5:52 PM | Permalink

          Oh god. Here I am on a plane to Vegas yelling Pat responded to my message! That was part of the stupid, I didn’t tell you my name. I absolutely adore you…if only I was 30 again…I love everything you stand for but most of all I love your words. Thank you for being in my life.

      • Knightrous
        Posted April 6, 2015 at 6:12 AM | Permalink

        Autocorrect on your phone, I’m guessing?

        It seems to be the modern world’s version of the faux pas.

        • Sandhya
          Posted April 9, 2015 at 4:43 AM | Permalink

          I’m curious. What are you talking about?

  7. chaelek
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 5:07 PM | Permalink

    Tiny gods, that was beautiful.

    Thank you.

  8. Torsailr
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 5:22 PM | Permalink

    I think the winner is the readers. That was wonderful.

  9. Posted April 4, 2015 at 5:33 PM | Permalink

    You honored Sir Terry so well with this. Thanks man.

  10. laura118b
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 5:50 PM | Permalink

    That was so much better than what was posted as the “real” match. The other felt like some sort of soft core bad fan fiction. I clarify with bad, because really even yours is fan fiction, but well written and honest, the other version seemed to have read only Cliff notes on the characters. I point to an earlier match where the writer had Binky as a skeletal horse when he is very real and alive. As we all know, more real and more alive than any other horse. But your story was love and knowledge of Discworld poured onto the page. Thank you for that.

  11. D_
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 6:02 PM | Permalink

    How could we not be convinced?
    I love your work. Thank you for doing it.

  12. Oneirogen
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 6:15 PM | Permalink

    Pat, if you could please stop making me cry it’d be greatly appreciated, thanks.

    P.S. Forget that rubbish above, thank you for that bittersweet tribute.

  13. lovelylass987
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 6:25 PM | Permalink

    The two pieces were absolutely lovely. I love it when you feed us little Kingkiller snippets.

  14. dumaike
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 6:44 PM | Permalink

    I’ve been reading your blog for a long time, seen you speak, and contribute to Worldbuilders. I just registered because this story brought tears to my eyes. My girlfriend is wondering why I’m sitting here sobbing.

    It’s such an amazing tribute to Terry. You’ve really outdone yourself this time.

  15. oliphant
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 7:30 PM | Permalink

    Beautiful. Thank you!

  16. Not_Mandatory
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 8:48 PM | Permalink

    Long time reader and follower who simply had to register after reading your tribute.

    That was fantastic. Delightful. Moving. It was a soothing balm, lovingly applied, to the aching souls of SF readers everywhere.

    It was, in a word, beautiful, Pat.

    • Posted April 4, 2015 at 9:46 PM | Permalink

      “Long time reader and follower who simply had to register after reading your tribute.”

      I know that feeling. I wonder how many new members will register because of this post.

      • Orynae
        Posted April 5, 2015 at 12:13 AM | Permalink


        • Zach K
          Posted April 6, 2015 at 5:56 PM | Permalink

          Me! And also buy the books!

          • Zombieranke
            Posted April 7, 2015 at 7:56 AM | Permalink


    • Ari
      Posted April 8, 2015 at 3:01 AM | Permalink

      Ah, you make me feel so cheap. I registered for a pair of copper dice.

  17. Kthaeh
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 9:12 PM | Permalink

    Well played, sir. I have voted accordingly. And thank you.

  18. Constance
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 9:44 PM | Permalink

    I haven’t read the second story yet but I had to log in to tell you how beautiful this was. You do Sir Pterry proud. This is more his version than that disturbing piece they featured.

    • Constance
      Posted April 4, 2015 at 9:53 PM | Permalink

      And fully in tears, I vote for Susan. Because Felurian is wise. Your writing was beautiful and moving and exactly -exactly- what I wanted to see. Thank you Pat.

  19. Fluvre
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 10:07 PM | Permalink

    Its not polite to make grown men cry like that.

  20. McWafflefeather
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 10:14 PM | Permalink

    Thank you.

  21. vladimyr
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 11:20 PM | Permalink

    Pat, you made me cry, in a good way, at least a couple times between this and the bit on suvudu.

    Your writing of the Discworld Death is so good that for a second I though it was a collaborative piece. Then I nearly cried again.

    Does Felurian not speak in rhyme when she is not in Fey?

  22. Orynae
    Posted April 4, 2015 at 11:53 PM | Permalink

    Oh you beautiful darling! This sounds just like you, even during the Discworld introduction. I didn’t even know it was possible to do such an amazing Discworld in a voice that isn’t Terry Pratchett’s.

    Now to go read the second story…

    • Orynae
      Posted April 5, 2015 at 12:12 AM | Permalink

      I see how it is…
      You’re trying to make us all cry :’)

      • Posted April 5, 2015 at 2:18 AM | Permalink

        Kinda yeah. A little bit.

        • Zanmatoer
          Posted April 6, 2015 at 9:12 AM | Permalink

          Suffice to say you succeeded in all respects

          • imnosuperhero
            Posted April 9, 2015 at 1:48 AM | Permalink


  23. Andalf The Beard
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 12:36 AM | Permalink

    I must say I was skeptical when you said you knew what to write and that Felurian had to win, even so I gave her my vote. Had I been wrong to be skeptical? I don’t believe so, it only made what you surprised us with so much more powerful.

    I’m sorry I could not see Felurian stand atop the bodies of those who might have fell beneath her, but I am not sorry that Susan took her place. You’ve done yourself a tremendous service in honour of Sir Pratchett. Very well done.

  24. WhiteWizard42
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 1:24 AM | Permalink

    You magnificent bastard.

    (Somehow managed to create an account here through the tears, just to say: Thank you for all you do.)

  25. midobal
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 3:01 AM | Permalink

    Awesome tribute sir. You should be proud of all the tears shed. Thank you.

  26. Bilbo
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 5:22 AM | Permalink

    I do not like
    “This is just as it should be. It has always been this way. It will always be this way.”
    -> it reminds me too much of Auri (every second sentence¹ in “the slow regard of the silent things” is “it is all as it should be”) I like this, son´t get me wrong. But you use this so often, it´s…
    I would have said just

    ” And this world, these elephants, this turtle, (whose name is A’Tuin) are all gilded with a crown of rainbows.

    It has always been this way.”

    The rest… I really enjoyed it.
    Felurian was great. And Susan! I like Susan.
    I need to read Terry Pratchett [The day I decided this he died. I hope it is not my fault]
    and this prologue is one of the reasons why.

    ¹the other sentence is “But no.”

    • Holmelund
      Posted April 6, 2015 at 1:06 PM | Permalink

      It takes a special kind of presumptuous asshole to tell an author what you would have written instead of him.

      • Bilbo
        Posted April 7, 2015 at 3:52 PM | Permalink

        I think special “kind of presumptuous asshole” describes me very well. But I think most of the people in the world are assholes. And I am not the most presumptuous of them.
        What you wrote…
        You may be right, but not now and not here.

        I do not think I write better than Patrick Rothfuss. I don´t say “look, this is the way I would have done it, watch me and learn to write”
        You would nave been right if you said my comment was moot and unfitting.
        This is true, it is not my job to proofread Pat´s text. And no one asked me to do it. AND, I didn´t do it, I just commented one totally extraneous detail.
        But so what? It is seems presumptuous to you, but you don´t know why I wrote this. And the reason is definitly NOT, that I wanted to be smart-alecky.

        Second… “to tell an author”.
        Maybe you wrote this on moral grounds. Then ok.
        But. This sounds to like “to tell an author – how could you tell an author what is good or bad, this is so presumptuous – YOU are not an author, he is the pro.”
        And again. How could you know?You do not know the first note of the music that moves me.
        I could be an author. I am not. But I can tell you I do write better than lots of authors, and that is not very difficult.
        Not every author is an good author, so it doesn´t say anything he (or her) is a good writer, too.

        Third. When we ignore my comment was unfittung.
        “It takes a special kind of presumptuous asshole to tell an author what would have written instead of him”.
        In general: What do you think criticism is?
        You are probably that kind of person who only says “I hate your text”¹ (in the case you do hate the text). Now you destroyed the author´s self-assuredness, made you and him unhappy and that´s it. This is te worst kind of criticism.
        A bit better it would have been if you said him, what you didn´t like.
        And that he also understands what do you mean, that he can´t change it even worse, you have to tell him what you would change into what. Not as a [i-am-better-]colleague, but as a reader.
        Yes, I know. The problem is people really think the critic think he´s better than the author. But he usally think this…
        When I thought I could write this bloody story more emotional, more convincing, I would write my own. “I wouldn´t be here if I didn´t think I had anything to learn.”

        But I will remember your words. It really has to be annoying to be “corrected”. In stylistic ways. I think I will have to use this more carefully.

        Fourth. Can´t you forgive a stupid presumptous asshole? I don´t get the sense of your comment if you are not a stupid presumptous asshole yourself.

        Sixth. If I did any mistakes, let me know. Correct me. I would be really pleased.

        ¹or love, whatever, there is no difference. (oh, there is one! you wouldn´t have replied to my comment, right?)

        • Kali
          Posted April 8, 2015 at 10:12 AM | Permalink

          Mistake: You come to a creator’s space to offer unsolicited criticism. This is rude.

          It is not that authors cannot benefit from critique, it’s that your advice is unasked for, which is presumptuous. Other people notice you being rude, and they point out your transgression.

          You have every right to have your opinions on all and sundry, but when you come here and behave rudely, the consequences are that people will not welcome you.

          • Bilbo
            Posted April 8, 2015 at 10:32 AM | Permalink

            Yes. I agree.
            I know I was rude, and I am sorry for that.
            The thing is… I did not want to be rude.
            I have some problems with social contacts.
            But I do learn from my own mistakes, so I think it was necessary to tell me not to behave like a presumptuous asshole.
            Thank you, and I still am sorry.

        • Holmelund
          Posted April 8, 2015 at 2:02 PM | Permalink

          You sounded rude and I, rudely, told you so.
          Guess we both fucked up on this one.

          *Shake hands*?

          • Posted April 8, 2015 at 7:32 PM | Permalink

            That’s well said, but the addition of an “I’m sorry” would be nice, too…

          • Holmelund
            Posted April 9, 2015 at 2:41 AM | Permalink

            I’m sorry
            (Imagine it edited in above to Bilbo)

          • Bilbo
            Posted April 9, 2015 at 4:06 PM | Permalink

            *Shaking hands* :)
            True, true, true.
            Well, one last time I have to say I am sorry.
            And that the world might be full of rude people, but… you seem very nice to me.
            It´s just… oh, I have to stop talking or I more stupid things will come out.
            Thanks a lot.

            “We’re a lovely couple of [weepy] idiots, aren’t we?”

  27. silentbobgrn
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 7:27 AM | Permalink

    My house is full with ninjas cutting onions.

  28. Boneman
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 7:43 AM | Permalink

    If there’s a better tribute to Sir terry, then I want to read it… that was so brilliantly logical, and so unexpected at the same time. Fantastic.

  29. Nixorbo
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 8:03 AM | Permalink

    All is forgiven, Felurian voters. All is forgiven.

  30. Cissus
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 9:19 AM | Permalink

    Wow, I mean that was… I’m blow away. Beautiful tribute, and so, so well executed.

    And I really like that in the end it didn’t become a popularity contest, and I like that even though Death was such an OP contestant, she probably won’t win now.

    Incredibly good job Rothfuss!

  31. raya
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 10:49 AM | Permalink

    Great work as always.. I was very touched. I like how all of Felurian’s sentences are lower-cased. It shows how much she cares for the rules of others.. :)

  32. Søren Hansen
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 12:40 PM | Permalink

    That was some mighty fine word-smithing you did there. It was a joy to read. You are a master smith of tales and wonders. Thank you.

  33. LizisSparta
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 12:44 PM | Permalink

    Great, Saturday evening and I’m sitting in front of the pc, in tears.
    Should have known that if someone can borrow Pratchett’s voice, it is his wordship.
    You really got his tone and humour, thanks so much for letting me hear this when I had almost made my peace with never hearing something new from the discworld… this was really great.

    And thanks againto reading to me, and a couple other people, on the Rhine, that was amazing as well, even if it was soo late til I was back home and in bed :)

  34. GuyG
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 4:48 PM | Permalink

    a wonderfully written farewell from one world builder to another.

    It takes a great deal of talent to integrate characters from 3 different worlds in a way that their original characteristics both kept and elevates each other, and i absolutely loved seeing Susan and Death written in a Rothufussy kind of way so well done Pat! you’ve always had my respect, but for this you can also have my bow, axe, bone ring, dragon lance, valerian steel sword, minstrel crown and Binky.

  35. Daina
    Posted April 5, 2015 at 4:59 PM | Permalink

    You, sir, have caused me to smear my makeup. And it’s not often I put the damned thing on. What have you to say for yourself?

    Oh, never mind. It’s time to take the stupid paint off anyway. I should’ve known you’d shanghai the whole thing and rig it. And you’ve done it so masterfully. Death might have taken sir Terry from us, but she left his voice with you. Take good care of it.

  36. Knightrous
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 6:16 AM | Permalink

    I have to admit, Pat, the description of the Discworld rang slightly more of Douglas Adams, as if he was trying to write his take on Pratchett.

    No bad thing, to my way of thinking, and kind of appropriate in the circumstance, as if it was his way of welcoming Pratchett to the hereafter.

  37. Kthaeh
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 7:21 AM | Permalink

    By the way, Pat, have you had any response from Mr. Gaiman? Was he asked to write a piece as well? It’s not that yours was in any way insufficient or unsatisfying – it was perfect. I’m merely curious about what he might have done with the match, or what feedback he offered, if any.

    • Daina
      Posted April 7, 2015 at 6:17 AM | Permalink

      This should be made into a comic. Then the circle will be complete.

      • Kthaeh
        Posted April 8, 2015 at 9:09 AM | Permalink

        ^^This. FTW.

        • Constance
          Posted April 10, 2015 at 9:55 AM | Permalink

          Thirding. Paul Kidby or one of the many who work with Neil?

    • Posted April 8, 2015 at 7:45 PM | Permalink

      I checked with Neil before I wrote it. First to make sure he didn’t want to write it himself. And second to make sure he was okay with me writing it, if he wasn’t interested.

      He said he was okay with me taking a swing at it. He was very gracious about it. He’s a lovely guy.

      • SporkTastic
        Posted April 9, 2015 at 2:17 AM | Permalink

        I am truly not sure who to be more jealous of. Casually calling up Neil Gaiman…such an awesome responsibility.

        Do you get to fanboy over other artists?

        And on the other hand, being able to shoot the breeze with Pat…really do not know how to even.

        • SporkTastic
          Posted April 9, 2015 at 1:59 PM | Permalink

          Mean “fanboy over other authors” (late night brain), but I think “artists” still works – both yourself and Mr. Gaiman create art; the medium is language, and the canvas is the mind. And, the occasional brown-nosed brush.

      • Kthaeh
        Posted April 9, 2015 at 8:04 AM | Permalink

        Gracious and lovely is the consistent report on Neil. Thanks for answering, Pat.

  38. Arydis
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 10:28 AM | Permalink


    As others have said, this was full of awesome and class. I saw the vitriol on the Suvudu website when you pulled ahead, and mourned at it. I hope those who felt wronged find peace at such a fitting tribute. Somehow, though on a much smaller scale, it reminded me of Asimov’s Seldon crisises when you said,

    “But to write that story, I had to be in control of things, so I made a Facebook post letting people know we only had a few hours, and that I knew what I wanted to write. Suddenly, things changed. And by the next morning…”

    And this little snipet spoke so well of the true nature of Felurian that can be overlooked by the trappings of such a fae creature.

    ““and thus I come to you.” Felurian said, “I leave the safety of my forest glade. I come before you all unarmed and unafraid.”

    “And naked.”

    Felurian looked down at herself, then up again, her expression blithe. “even so,” she said politely, as if Susan had made a particularly dull observation about the weather. “is that all that you can see? is what I heard so wrong?”

    Susan felt her face go hot at the reproach.

    “if you have skill at seeing, look at Me,” Felurian said, spreading her arms wide to her sides. “am I some tawdry thing? am I a beast consumed with nothing more than lust? am I mere brightness with no spark beneath?””

  39. Jambohemie
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 10:51 AM | Permalink

    You bastard.

    Don’t get me wrong, that is meant with as much respect as can be mustered this early in the morning while I am only half-awake, sitting at my desk at work trying to gather the energy and fortitude to go out and fulfill my duties; earn my paycheck. It has been trying as of late as things are changing at the company I work for, so there have been a lot of long and dirty days that weary me.

    I’m not as young as I used to be. I’ll never be as healthy as I used to be. I’ll never be as energetic as I used to be, or as artistic. All these things sadden me, but as they have happened slowly over time they have become acceptable.

    Things change. Work. Relationships. Habits and hobbies. People we know and love. People we don’t know, but still love anyway. I got to meet Terry Pratchett at a book signing, many, many years ago, and was too intimidated to say much. The man was my favorite author for Pete’s sake; the things he could do with humor dwarfed anyone else I had ever read. But it wasn’t just his humor, the man could tell a story. His characters lived and breathed. They had depth and soul. Every new Discworld book was a bright ray of sunshine that I knew I would read, and then reread, and then reread again later down the road. I always find something new to laugh at, something that I missed on previous readings, something that my brain just didn’t click on because I was too busy consuming the books words that I missed it, or perhaps I just wasn’t old enough to appreciate the sentiments expressed. Somehow I missed it, but I am now given a gift of something that I hadn’t noticed before, and that only serves to make me want to read another Discworld novel to see what I might have missed in that one.

    So it was on one of those long and dirty days that I got a call from my wife. I had been too busy at work to check out anything on the internet that day, and so I got to hear the news from someone I love, which I’m sure helped me contain my emotions at hearing the news that my favorite author had passed. It also helped that it didn’t come out of left-field. Terry had long talked about ending his life if his disease got too bad, and after reading articles about how he could no longer type his books but had to have them transcribed instead I kind of thought he might be nearing that point. I was very nervous when Snuff was announced as his next novel, I thought that he might be trying to tell us something. But he wasn’t and we got Raising Steam and still have one last Tiffany Aching story to look forward to.

    The point is this: I never cried. I thought I might, the next time I cracked open one of his books. I felt the tears would probably flow then. Then! At a time of my choosing. Home, in bed or in my recliner. Not sitting at work on a Monday morning trying to work up the enthusiasm to work, checking some of my favorite websites. Catching up on a favorite author’s blog and clicking a link in that same blog only to find the tears that I knew would one day probably come. They just showed up sooner than I expected.

    You wrote Terry and Neil’s characters remarkably well, and treated us with a loving tribute to Sir Terry and provided me with a little therapy along the way. Thank you.

    You bastard.

  40. wheretkb
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 2:29 PM | Permalink

    Thank you for this. Thank you so very much!

  41. Zach K
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 5:59 PM | Permalink

    That was beautiful.

    That characteristic description at the beginning, just to describe….

    The tears started then, and somehow I’m not currently sitting in a puddle.

    Thank you.

    Thank you very much.

  42. ailouron
    Posted April 6, 2015 at 11:55 PM | Permalink

    Last match, I was going to vote for Susan. If Nobby Nobbs, Agnes Nitt, or anyone else from Sir Terry had been in the match I probably would have voted for them, too. I felt SO GUILTY when I didn’t vote for Susan, but I wanted to read what you would write. I hoped it would be worth it. Thank you for taking away the guilt, for making it worth it. You wrote a beautiful tribute.

  43. spear_of_the_island
    Posted April 7, 2015 at 5:35 AM | Permalink

    A great story. Thank you very much!

  44. randomhero_135
    Posted April 7, 2015 at 7:18 AM | Permalink

    “Just so” gave me A Song of Ice and Fire Flashbacks. Great little read, your posts always hold me over between books

  45. TheFlyingFish
    Posted April 7, 2015 at 12:27 PM | Permalink

    The thought of Felurian playing Twister makes my eyes cross.

  46. SporkTastic
    Posted April 7, 2015 at 3:00 PM | Permalink

    You did a wonderful thing. Sir Pratchett would be proud, and probably honored. I believe Mr. Gaiman would also enjoy your prologue as well. :-)

    • SporkTastic
      Posted April 7, 2015 at 3:19 PM | Permalink

      …and now, in reference to the thing itself. I’m crying, Pat. You truly are the Kwisatz Paterach, He Who Sees Into The Hearts of All, Where Many Dare Not See.

      Thank you.

  47. Bitterman
    Posted April 7, 2015 at 6:04 PM | Permalink


    That was… duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.

    That was awesome.

  48. Ari
    Posted April 8, 2015 at 2:52 AM | Permalink

    I do not know if read all the comments, but just in case…

    This story is… well, it’s difficult to find adjectives for. Especially if, like me, you are nothing of a wordsmith. If you can’t even put on your daddy’s shoes and pretend to be tall.
    This story is… well, it’s a tiny story. I can safely say this much. It is a tiny story, but everything you need is there, in the exact perfect place, and nothing is missing or lost or mislaid.

    It is an enchanting story, but only if enchanting means the creation of a spell, so soft that you don’t even notice it being woven around you until you are encircled by its glimmering. Entranced. Ensnared? For once such a story has caught you, escape is certainly not guaranteed. Enchantments are dangerous things, after all.

    And now that I been been daring and used such a word as ‘enchanting’, I begin to feel that it actually means something else. Something less.

    Ah well. I will just hope that my meaning is here, somewhere. In the subtext. In those little white spaces between the black letters.

  49. Posted April 8, 2015 at 8:38 AM | Permalink

    Just another reader who finally had to register to express his gratitude for this. As a long-time fan of Sir Pterry, I was quite distraught when I saw Susan had come up against Felurian, as I did not want to choose. So I didn’t. I know it’s just a silly internet-voting popularity contest, but I honestly could not choose between the two of them. When Felurian won, I was glad that, coward as I was, someone had made the decision for me and I could at least vote for Felurian in the final bracket. And then I read that damned write-up. You are absolutely right, of course — despite all other arguments to the contrary, Susan is the obvious choice. I can only say how glad I am that Felurian won her way to the finals so that we all got a chance to read your take on the battle.

    Thank you again.

  50. Posted April 8, 2015 at 8:45 AM | Permalink

    You made me weepy. Death is one of my all-time favorite characters, but I was swayed. <3

  51. Valarya
    Posted April 8, 2015 at 12:31 PM | Permalink

    Felurian laughed again. “show me rules,” she said, gesturing with one hand to the empty air around her. “and if you can, then show me any reason I should follow them.”

    This is so YOU (rather, so Kvothe), that it made me smile so much. Thanks for writing this. *crying*


  52. jcjc1414
    Posted April 8, 2015 at 9:44 PM | Permalink

    All I have to say is that you haven’t released a third novel in your trilogy, beginning with The Name of the Wind, and I frankly find the use of time otherwise a bit silly. We’ve moved on from you producing groundbreaking literature to a fan fiction thread. Sorry, not trying to be be mean but

    • Knightrous
      Posted April 9, 2015 at 6:59 AM | Permalink

      To paraphrase Shigeru Miyamoto:

      “A delayed book is eventually good, but a rushed book is forever bad.”

      Yes, we know your sense of self-entitlement demands that you have the book now, but that doesn’t mean you can demand it of the actual author. Well, at least not without a snarky comeback.

    • Daina
      Posted April 14, 2015 at 4:53 AM | Permalink

      Here’s an idea: why don’t you contact Pat’s publisher and offer to pay the advance Pat got for the trilogy (or whatever monetary arrangements they made) and then maybe you can have the right to tell Pat what he should write. In the meantime, he doesn’t work for you.

  53. jcjc1414
    Posted April 8, 2015 at 9:46 PM | Permalink

    The slow regard of silent things kept me satisfied for an hour or so. I would rather you devote your time more appropriately.

    • Posted April 8, 2015 at 11:06 PM | Permalink

      Sorry. The blog where everyone got to vote on how I spend my free time was a couple weeks ago. I’m afraid you missed it.

      • imnosuperhero
        Posted April 9, 2015 at 1:48 AM | Permalink

        I think this is this the part where Demi Moore’s hubby goes “OOOH, BURN!!!

      • SporkTastic
        Posted April 9, 2015 at 2:20 AM | Permalink

        This…ummm…this may call for the snarkiest of snarky websites. Complete with a button that moves away from the cursor when people attempt to click “write more books”.

      • Kimberlyand
        Posted April 27, 2015 at 9:11 PM | Permalink

        I just laughed so hard I snorted. Repeatedly.

    • imnosuperhero
      Posted April 9, 2015 at 1:46 AM | Permalink

      Egads, you make -me- want to jump up and down on your internet-trolling bum. God only knows how Rothfuss takes it so well. (I’m guessing repetition, though, you twerps are five for a dollar at the corner store.)

    • Kthaeh
      Posted April 9, 2015 at 7:52 AM | Permalink

      Just curious…How many hours of satisfaction have you provided to Pat lately?

  54. Karissima
    Posted April 9, 2015 at 8:31 AM | Permalink

    Since I live under a rock, the post about Felurian vs Susan was also the crushing news regarding Sir Terry.
    This helped. A little.

    • Posted April 9, 2015 at 1:13 PM | Permalink

      Sorry to be the one to break the news to you…

  55. Mapleson
    Posted April 9, 2015 at 8:45 AM | Permalink

    My grandmother died over the weekend, and I cannot afford to go to her funeral, nor could I afford to go to her 90th birthday four months ago. Neil Gaiman’s Death had faded from my active memory, but this little tale brought her back vividly. I read the first part while walking home yesterday in the wind and rain. I read the second part this morning while walking to work today in the rain and wind. My world seems dark and gloomy at the moment, but this reminded me that dark can have humour and gloomy can reveal the light.

    Thank-you Pat. It’s not what I thought I desire most from your pen (or should that be fingers?), but it turned out that this was an unexpected treat that gave me some of what I need. I know you don’t need my permission, but keep on having fun and having fun writing, because I wouldn’t be equally great otherwise.

  56. Camelica
    Posted April 10, 2015 at 1:52 AM | Permalink

    You are a beautiful man with a big kind heart!
    I didn’t know sir Terry but I imagine you’d manage to make him cry too with this tribute.

    It is as someone said- Felurian is wise. And so are you!

    From the bottom of my heart – thank you!

  57. bruenor80
    Posted April 10, 2015 at 1:53 AM | Permalink

    Thanks for this Pat. Fitting tribute to Susan’s great-grandfather.

  58. Constance
    Posted April 10, 2015 at 9:53 AM | Permalink

    Something I came back to add (Yes, I come back. I’ve read and re-read both stories so many times as it feels like a balm on a still painful hurt in my heart…) is that I LOVE how Felurian brings up the fact she’s more than just a sexual object and how Susan is abashedly embarrassed at not seeing it at first. So many of the other authors in the Cage Match focus on the sex and desire instead of the wild primal magic that lies at the heart of her.

  59. Adventureless_Hero
    Posted April 10, 2015 at 1:38 PM | Permalink

    Egad man! These are so damned tasty! I just now learned about the Suvudu cage matches and killed a good hour and a half at work reading the previous matches. Does the victor get to submit the “How It Would Go Down” bit? This is like powerhouse author fanfiction! ^w^

  60. Kthaeh
    Posted April 12, 2015 at 8:54 AM | Permalink

    Hey Pat, another question for you if you’re still checking this thread. Has all the Worldbuilders fundraising stuff been sent out already? I mean the lottery prizes, specifically. I know it was a TON of stuff to get in the mail, though I’m guessing by now it’s all done. But if I can still hold out hope, I could use a bit of that right now.

  61. Jonathan Pinches
    Posted April 15, 2015 at 4:57 AM | Permalink


  62. andrewtweber
    Posted April 28, 2015 at 12:46 PM | Permalink

    Hi Pat, beautiful, but when Susan speaks with Death’s voice shouldn’t there be no quotation marks?

  63. Daina
    Posted July 3, 2020 at 5:51 AM | Permalink

    Hi, Pat. I know it’s been five years, but something just reminded me of this, and I wanted to reread it, but Suvudu site seems to have disappeared. You wouldn’t by any chance still have a copy of the story and mind posting it somewhere?

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