The Business of Managing a Business

Hey there everybody, long time no see.

Do you know that feeling happens when you wake up all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, excited to get some solid work done?

So you get up, take your meds, and decide to start your day by wrapping up some small projects. Get a nice clean slate. Clear your desk so you can focus on getting the really important stuff done.

But when you open up your e-mail, you realize that first you need to catch up on e-mail. Because when you look up from the bottom of your inbox it’s such a deep hole that all you can see is a faint a circle of light like they talk about in The Ring.

So you’re doing e-mail, clearing out the chaff, making progress, apologizing to the folks you’ve meant to reply to for months. Then someone texts you with a quick question looking for clarification about a contract, and then someone *else* pings you on Signal asking if you want to be on a panel at a convention. Then you have a skype call so you can do some art direction about the illustrations for the upcoming French edition of your book…

(Yes. Seriously. Art by the Amazing Marc Simonetti.)

So you get that about 73% finished before you have to jump into a meeting about who is going to be your literary executor just in case you get hit by a bus the next time you go out for coffee, and it’s an important meeting, but it’s really complicated, and you don’t *quite* get it finished before you have to have a conference call about copyrighting certain parts of your IP…

Then, eventually, you realize it’s 11:00 at night, and despite spending your whole day doing things, you feel like you haven’t gotten anything done.

If you *don’t* know what that’s like. I’m delighted for you. But that pattern has been my default for… like… a really long time.

None of you will be shocked to hear that I am not a natural organizer. Sure I make lists. I make lots of lists. Then eventually I have to find and organize the lists that were meant to keep me organized in the first place. So I make a list of the lists I need to organize.

As a friend of mine very correctly said recently: I am a chaos generator.

So. We here at Rothco are finally biting the bullet and hiring a business manager. Or rather, we’ve been going through the laborious process of figuring out what exactly we want/need from a business manager. In order to do this, we’ve been creating some sort of arcane document called a… Jorb Listing?

Surprising no-one, even this step of the process has been a bit… chaotic. As shown by this screencap of an early draft of the google doc:

(Please help me.)

In a nutshell, I need someone to help manage my… everything. Someone with experience and training to help my team handle the day-to-day business of things so I can focus on doing the things that only *I* can do. Like write books and spend time with my kids.

I’ve been deliberating for a long time as to whether or not to mention this job on the blog.

On one hand, I want to get the word out. I want as many applicants as possible, because I want to find someone *amazing* for this job. (Also because I don’t want to have to go through the time-consuming and excruciating process of doing a second job search later.)

And, truth be told, y’all are pretty amazing, so it only makes sense that I’d like to open the door for you to apply. What’s more, I’m guessing a lot of you know some amazing people that you might want to mention this job to. Being a fan isn’t a requirement for this job, so if y’all know any great organizers/managers with experience who are either looking for a job, or looking to change jobs…

(My expectations are super reasonable.)

But here’s the problem, posting the job here might lead to some real hassle. It takes a long time to go through applications, and if we get 300 people applying just for shits and giggles, it’s going to waste a *ton* of time. And time is in short supply here.

So here’s the thing. I vouched for you. I told my team that y’all are cool. I’ve reassured them that even though some of you might be tempted to throw in a joke application, you wouldn’t actually do that. Because yeah, sure, one joke application might be funny. But 200 of them will waste a week of my team’s time, and make it *harder* for me to actually find the person I’m looking for.

So here it goes:

*****

  • Elodin Enterprises Seeks Full-Time Business Manager:

Elodin Enterprises is a Stevens Point-based company that works with the intellectual property, licensing, and merchandising for the author Patrick Rothfuss. In addition to this, we collaborate closely with Worldbuilders, the non-profit founded by Pat. We are looking for a business manager who will be able to plan and lead varied projects, manage employees, act as liaison and coordinator, and generally ensure everything Elodin Enterprises works consistently, efficiently and smoothly. 

We are looking for a business manager to plan and lead varied projects, streamline workflow, and facilitate a workspace where Pat is able to pursue his creative work productively. Our long-term goal is to separate the creative elements of Elodin Enterprises from day-to-day operations. 

We’re looking for a leader who can manage initiatives on time, oversee employees to ensure that they are functioning at optimum levels, and provide an efficient, flexible structure around which our ideas and people can continue to grow. 

Our ideal candidate is a talented individual who is self-motivated and committed to making the world a better place. This position will involve a high level of communication, organization, planning, and problem-solving. As someone in a high-level position in the organization, you would also be responsible for supporting a positive work environment. 

Key Responsibilities:

  • Project oversight and management 
  • Oversight and management of employees
  • Setting and completing productive business goals
  • Ensure long term financial stability 
  • Understand, develop, and operate within our brand

Required Skills

  • Very skilled with Google Apps (Calendar, Drive, Gmail, Groups, etc)
  • Meticulous and detail oriented
  • Critical thinker who makes good, informed, and ethical decisions
  • Extremely good at writing and email communication
  • Task driven and able to work independently
  • Extraordinarily organized
  • Fast learner at new programs and processes
  • Maintaining complete and accurate files
  • Working with company accountants
  • Managing a small team of full-time employees
  • Valid driver’s license and reliable transportation

Helpful, but not required experience:

  • Familiarity with Android phones
  • OBS and other streaming software
  • Discord, Slack, Skype, and other communications software
  • Contract reading and negotiation
  • Familiarity with Microsoft Excel and Microsoft Office
  • Property/Facilities Management
  • Product development

The position will require the ability to oversee many projects simultaneously, maintaining timelines and deadlines for all of them, while ensuring that the rest of the team is doing the same. As a small organization, we may ask that you pitch in as odds-and-ends tasks come up.

This position is full-time and is based in Stevens Point, Wisconsin. Pay will be commensurate with experience. Position includes health care benefits, vacation and holiday time off.

Elodin Enterprises is an equal opportunity employer.

To apply for this position, please submit a cover letter and resume to jobs(@)patrothfuss.com.

Deadline for application is July 25th.

*****

Okay folks. I’m trusting you. Please share this around with anyone you think might be legitimately interested and qualified.

I’m also trusting you *not* to apply just because you hate your current job and were totally an assistant manager at a Pizza Hut that one summer.

On the other hand, if you’d like to apply for OTHER jobs in the comments below, I’d love to see what you have to offer Rothco. Think you’d be a great minion? List your unique skills below. Want to be my Dolphin wrangler? Food taster? Court Jester? Lovely. I’m eager to see what qualifications you bring to the table.

Just make sure to do it in the comments below, not in the e-mail above.

Share and enjoy,

pat

This entry was posted in a ganglion of irreconcilable antagonisms, calling on the legions, I am completely fucking serious, social networking, The Art of Letting Go, the business of writing. By Thera102 Responses

102 Comments

  1. Mjarnos
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 4:31 AM | Permalink

    If you have a marketing internship open, I would be delighted and fly over. I also settle for being the new Kevin minion.

  2. Jeremy
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 4:41 AM | Permalink

    Long time no see!
    Hope you find the right person. I hate that level of BS getting in the way of real work. I make it a career goal to never be promoted to management.

    I’m happy to provide all round IT support when your world domination team starts to assimilate Australia…
    Stay classy
    Jeremy

  3. Posted July 12, 2019 at 5:51 AM | Permalink

    So I’m on the wrong continent but I am a graphic designer and would love to work with ye (remotely) if there is anything going. Best of luck with hiring the manager.

  4. Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:00 AM | Permalink

    Composer. I would dearly love to tackle some of the music you write about. Samples at CustomNerdMusic.com (Based in MN)

  5. Veronica
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:06 AM | Permalink

    I don’t have any really job skills. But I’d love to be someone’s minion (minion power hour, yay) and learn the hard way. Pretty good at research, and anything online related.

    • Veronica
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:18 AM | Permalink

      OP here. I forgot to mention, I’m looking for something more valuable than money, and that is EXPERIENCE. I don’t actually expect to get paid, since I don’t have any actual experience (besides customer service) to offer.

  6. Adrian
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:34 AM | Permalink

    “A problem well-stated is half-solved” and “The first step in solving a problem is recognizing there is one” comes to mind…

    Best blog entry ever : gives me hope about reading book 3 before the heat death of the universe !

    Finger crossed you find someone as talented in management skills as you are in writing.

  7. Jacob Wayne Moore
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:45 AM | Permalink

    I’d apply but unfortunately would need to be a remote employee. I’m currently a software developer but have an MPA with a concentration in nonprofit management, certified mediator, and a SAFe Certified Agilist. I’d recommend two positions actually instead of one. Scheduler/Executive Assistant and Operations Manager.

    • Andy VH
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 4:15 PM | Permalink

      Let’s go, fellow software engineer Rothfuss fan
      Could this be the thread I’ve been waiting for, where we discuss how programming is basically sygaldry in real life?!

  8. Sandi
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:00 AM | Permalink

    I am not qualified for this job so no, I shall not be applying. Good luck on the search. However, you might add in there as a responsibility maintain confidentiality because this person will be in your wor k world and might hear something about the book, or your personal life that you do not want out there.

    • Ben
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:20 AM | Permalink

      I’m sure there’d be an NDA in the process.

      • Posted July 15, 2019 at 2:53 AM | Permalink

        Oh yes. A nightmarish NDA. We make you sign it in blood.

        • James Weaver
          Posted July 15, 2019 at 8:52 AM | Permalink

          My blood, or do you just have a random jar of blood for contract signings? Important distinction there.

          Joking aside, this seems like something my wife would be suited for, but neither of us is really interested in leaving Montreal.

          Good luck on the hunt for a business-y manager-y type person.

  9. Meagan
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:17 AM | Permalink

    I’m actually qualified for this job AND I’m a freelance editor and proofreader. I’ve been an office manager at two different businesses. If this was a remote position, I’d jump on it in a heartbeat. (I’m in Georgia for some insane reason. Have you heard about the weather and bugs down here??) If you ever need any editing and/or proofing done, I’d love to help! I work with several clients and 1.5 publishers. (I say that because I’ve been working with one publisher for 4 years and I’m just getting started with a second one.) Working with you on anything would be amazing. I love your work, both your stories and your work with Worldbuilders!

  10. Matt
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:27 AM | Permalink

    Some advice:

    1. If you truly want the “best” person, list a salary or at least a range. This job is so nebulous that it sounds like it could be anywhere from minimum wage to six figures. The “best” person is probably going to have to relocate, which means a lot of applicants will just not apply assuming it won’t pay enough.

    2. The job requirements seem a little on the vague side. Yes, you’ve listed some skills, but an enormous amount of people can use Google Apps, are meticulous critical thinkers, have a driver’s license, are good with email, and have managed (at least) a small team of employees. Honestly, the person at Pizza Hut sounds like they might meet the requirements. I’m not sure I could be mad at anyone for applying for this job. Is a degree required? What kind of degrees would you consider?

    3. I understand you’re trying to cast a wide net as to not limit yourself and miss the “best” person, but you’ve cast a really, really wide net here and then cautioned that you’re afraid you’re going to catch too many fish. Consider casting a smaller net.

    4. It doesn’t sound like you know exactly who you’re looking for here. A really good administrative assistant? A project manager? Someone who can negotiate contracts with a law background who also knows some HR stuff and moonlights as a life coach? Boy, that person sounds expensive. What are your top priorities? I think, unfortunately, you’re going to get a huge amount of applicants with a vast range of backgrounds and probably miss the “best” person who won’t apply.

    5. It sounds like you’re probably going to end up with someone local (just based on my best guess with job level and pay). In that case, think about who you know locally. You may know this really organized person. They probably work a middle management job at a very mundane, boring place, but are super responsible and efficient and make their company run like a well-oiled machine. It may seem like the best option here is to do a typical Pat project and make this a huge Internet party search extravaganza. Chaos. Find that person you know and go recruit them. They might have a family and are probably not a huge risk taker. Recruit that person. Pay them more than they’re making, assure them it’s a sustainable job, and provide good benefits. It may be that easy.

    • Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:59 AM | Permalink

      ^^ This is some really great advice, btw. I had the same thoughts when I was reading through. To articulate further, it would be great to see more concrete examples of the types of tasks/projects the person would be performing. Such as: coordinating meeting times for Pat, taking charge of Pat’s calendar, managing creation of art for a project by outlining the steps necessary to move it to completion, setting due dates and delegating each task, etc. That would give an applicant far better understanding of what they’d actually be *doing.*

      • Doug
        Posted July 12, 2019 at 1:01 PM | Permalink

        Seconded (thirded?), from an MBA in WA.

      • Josh
        Posted July 13, 2019 at 4:28 PM | Permalink

        ^^Beth is right on — and that’s so important not just for hiring, but for making sure the new employee gets off to a good start. i.e., it’s setting common expectations between employer & employee. So many hires don’t work b/c employers are unclear about expectations. And than all sides are confused and disappointed.

        omg, I’m going to stop nerding out about hiring processes now. good luck!

        • Posted July 14, 2019 at 8:52 AM | Permalink

          The only times I’ve had poor experiences working for other people was when expectations were completely vague and nebulous. And of course, then it was my fault when things weren’t completed properly. FFS. lol.

          Always set clear and concise expectations. Don’t use vague terms like ‘soon’ or ‘better.’ What is ‘soon’? A couple hours? A few days? A week? What is ‘better’? Can that be quantified? You have to be clear with what you need from them. If you’re not, as an employer, it’s your fault and responsibility if they screw up, not theirs. They can’t meet your expectations if they have no idea what they are. What seems obvious to you isn’t obvious to someone who’s just stepping into the business for the first time.

          I could go on. Part of what I do for a living is educating small business owners on how to effectively work with someone else within their business. Most of it revolves around expectations and how to articulate them clearly.

    • Auri Rodrigues
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 1:24 PM | Permalink

      I think you should be the one hired. Seriously.

    • Posted July 12, 2019 at 5:54 PM | Permalink

      Matt, you are wise.

    • Chris Rhoades
      Posted July 13, 2019 at 2:40 AM | Permalink

      Also agree with the above. Another point to consider to help tighten the bet is to think about what work is one time versus ongoing, or outsourceable. Lease management can be outsourced for a small fee. Workflow creation is one time. Think about what you need this position to do *the most* then let them job description form around that. Try drawing it like a tree with the trunk being that core skill, branches coming off it for the secondaries, then the leaves being the nice to haves. Then really look at the leaves to try to outsource or create a one time contract for them. In fact, you may find many of us could help with the leaves remotely, allowing you to find someone local for the trunk and branches. Hope that helps. Also it could be a sword tree to make it more fun. You can draw the things you value in the space under it :)

    • Josh
      Posted July 13, 2019 at 4:23 PM | Permalink

      ^Second (or third) all of this.

      I’d also suggest (if you haven’t already) talking to several other similar org’s who have created a similar position. Even better, if you can look at their job descriptions. Like any other writing, it’s really hard to compose a job description on a blank piece of paper. It’s a lot easier to use someone else’s JD as a template and/or foil to articulate your own JD.

    • Andrea Viloria
      Posted July 13, 2019 at 4:40 PM | Permalink

      I completely agree with this, the list of requirements needs to be more especific, because according to that job listing I have all the skills required (except the driver’s license and reliable transportation, because I’m from Colombia) plus the helpful but nor required experience, the wrangling skill and I also speak spanish, english and some french, will have a law degree by december this year (hello contract reading and negotiating) and I’m really good at managing schedules, which looks like something Pat needs.
      The thing is, I live in Colombia, and I’m not sure if this job is going to pay enough to justify changing countries, and there might be people more qualified than I am that are going to think the same.

      In any case, I hope Pat finds the right person for this job soon enough.

  11. Gabrielle
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:30 AM | Permalink

    If you evee need a translator from English to French (Canada). I am a student in this program and I also have a degree in Cinema and Litterature and I would like to develop my skills. At my stage I would do it for a letter of recommendation if you ever need to translate some Web pages or else.

    Best regards,

    A long time fan.

  12. Anthony
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:39 AM | Permalink

    Real talk: Did you ask Khoo? He got the Penny Arcade guys on the right track and I’m sure he could do the same for Mr. Rothfuss. At a minimum, he could recommend how to go about getting a good one.

    • Amstrad
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 11:31 PM | Permalink

      Came into the comments to also say it sounds like Pat needs his very own Robert Khoo. Best of luck to him in finding one!

  13. Jasmine
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:53 AM | Permalink

    I’d like to apply for Non-Resident Mathematician and Wrangler of Boats and Beasts. I have a degree in pure math plus some extra undocumented suffering, I have considerable experience in convincing both small animals and large mammals of the hoofed variety to follow my wishes, and I frequently practice kayaking and pretending to be a competent sailor when the actual seamen are taking a nap and make me do the steering like the big meanies they are.

    Additionally I speak one language fluently, one language badly, and dozens not at all.

    My residence is very far from Wisconsin, so this title will be valid so long as you come nowhere near the Maine coast.

    • Tim
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 9:08 AM | Permalink

      Ha look at that… I thought about applying as a Mathematician as well!
      I’m still trying to earn a degree in pure mathematics though :-)
      What part of pure Mathematics are you specialized in, if I may ask?

      Very cool to see there are other fellow mathematicians in love with pats books!
      Also: I could offer 2 fluent languages, 1 rather bad one (to be improved very soon) and dozens of ‘not at all’ as well ;-)

      • Jasmine
        Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:18 PM | Permalink

        I quit the undocumented suffering before I really got into the specialization, alas. The thing I know most about is probably abstract algebra, followed by real analysis (except I remember nothing about measure theory). And I don’t really do anything above high school math in my current job. I’m thinking about going back to get a certificate in data analysis and/or programming, because it turns out I’m kinda good at it, and I’m a bit bored currently.

        • Tim
          Posted July 13, 2019 at 4:10 AM | Permalink

          Ah, I see! I’m also doing lots of algebra.
          Although I’m currently specializing in arithmetic/algebraic geometry..
          Seems like a good idea! I think there are lots of intersting jobs in data science!
          I think topological data analysis is quite fascinating ;-)
          I don’t really know what exactly is demanded most, I’m still trying to become a researcher one day :-D

  14. Lauren
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:59 AM | Permalink

    Damn. I wish I could. Kinda think I’d be good at this one, but grad school and my current full-time jorb sort of get in the way. Best of luck to you, though! I’ll put the word out to some former co-workers of mine who might be good at this.

  15. Posted July 12, 2019 at 8:05 AM | Permalink

    I do social media marketing for small businesses, primarily via Facebook advertising.

    I have free content on my website if it’s helpful (a free fundamentals course that will walk you through the basics of setting up ads): https://gearworksmarketing.com/free-course/

    If you’re ever in need of someone to either do social media marketing or train someone on the team, I’m available. This would be great for reaching people and spreading the word about WorldBuilders.

    I also live in Eau Claire, so I’m close enough that I could be on site if needed.

  16. EnvyDragon
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 8:24 AM | Permalink

    To whom it may concern,

    I would like to apply for the position of office cat. While you may note in my resume that I am in fact human and not a literal cat, I ask you to overlook this in favor of my many qualifications. I am fuzzy, affectionate, aloof, and easily distracted by birds.

    More importantly, I am low-maintenance; all I need from you in return for my services is a box to shit in, a few motorized toys to distract myself, perhaps a laser pointer, and some dried, chicken-flavored sawdust chunks to munch on. Head and chin scratches would be appreciated, but are ultimately optional; all I ask is that you stay the fuck away from my tum-tum.

    If requested, I can meow or sing at the top of a staircase or a particularly echoey room. I am available to make silly faces or stupid decisions for instagram photos. I will not catch mice, but if requested I can try and fail to catch them in a virally endearing manner.

    I look forward to hearing from you soon. I do not have a phone or e-mail address you can respond to me at, but then again, neither would a cat.

    Thanks!

    • Posted July 15, 2019 at 4:22 AM | Permalink

      This is the best one so far…

      Double points because I wouldn’t be allergic to this cat.

  17. Julie
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 8:31 AM | Permalink

    Well, I didn’t *know* I was looking for a new job when I woke up this morning, yet here I am reading this for the 6th time in twenty minutes; mapping the distance between Des Moines and Steven’s Point; wondering how fast I can get out of my lease of the impossible happens.
    Give me 90 minutes to write the most important cover letter of my life and another half-day to find the courage to chase a dream I thought dead. Then check your email.

    • Hathelas
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 9:18 AM | Permalink

      I don’t know exactly why, but your comment made my morning – good luck!!!

  18. Charles Nicholson
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 8:34 AM | Permalink

    Hey Pat,

    My name is Charles Nicholson. I’m a programmer fluent in several languages (C, C++, Java, Python, etc.). I don’t know if you need a programmer or just generally skilled computer person, but if you do feel free to reach out via e-mail (cnich43@gmail.com).

    Thanks much!

  19. Andrew
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 8:38 AM | Permalink

    I would like to apply for the job of Chief Executive TV Watching Assistant and Video Game Buddy. I have over 30 of television watching experience. I am familiar with all the main streaming services as well as over the air programs. I also have 28 years of experience playing video games. I am familiar with games ranging from retro to modern.
    I do not talk during shows or movies.
    I can microwave popcorn like nobody else.
    I am open to soda chugging contests.
    I like my pizza with meat and cheese, but not opposed to Hawaiian.
    Please contact me for further details. I am looking forward to working with you.

  20. Roy
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 8:47 AM | Permalink

    Troll comment: I think you need to recruit Brandon Sanderson, he seems to display the requisite skills : )

    • Rob
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 1:40 PM | Permalink

      It may be Brandon’s wife that has the requisite skills.

  21. Megan
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 9:10 AM | Permalink

    Does Rothco need an armorer? Or Jewelry Crafter? I make chainmaille, so can do both of these things. I can’t speak for if it’ll actually deflect swords or not, but you know, that’s the risk you take when you’re getting into a sword fight.

  22. Thomas
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 9:31 AM | Permalink

    I’m curious about the requirement for a driver’s license. I see that on job listings sometimes, occasionally with “must be able to lift 50 pounds”, and I’ve always wondered why it mattered. Would a state ID and reliable transportation be sufficient, or must it be *specifically* a driver’s license? Is travel a requirement of the position? Is this some legal CYA thing? Are you indicating indirectly that you aren’t hiring on visas?

    I’m currently a team lead for a small software company, and meet most of the other requirements, which is why this question popped up here for me now in earnest.

    • Cynstarr
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:00 AM | Permalink

      I’m assuming they would need to legally “drive” somewhere. A State ID doesn’t get you that. Reliable transportation without it involves another person.

  23. Sorema
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 9:50 AM | Permalink

    Gah! This almost makes me want to stop practicing law and do something fun for once!

    On the other hand, happy to help with contract review and negotiation if you need that!

  24. Travis
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 9:53 AM | Permalink

    If you haven’t, you might want to reach out to Mike and Jerry, they seem to have some pretty good people working for them and have gone through this before, they may even be able to get you in touch with Mr. Khoo who could probably steer you in the right ditection.

    While I meet the qualifications, I’m busy here, chasing mothman and doing a network administrator/ I.T. management / general I.T. thing on the side.

    Best of luck, I hope you find someone excellent.

  25. Tony N
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:03 AM | Permalink

    Mechanical engineer here: I would gladly spearhead the Befouling our Adversary’s Sanity through Treats (BAST) team, wherein we use desktop catapults (or trebuchets if you really must) to pepper our peers with M&M’s. I am a proud, card carrying member of the Keeping a Variety Of Things on Hand, Enpocketed (KVOTHE) guild; you can always count on me to have WD40 if it’s supposed to move and doesn’t, or duct tape if it moves and shouldn’t. Furthermore, I live my life according to a simple code, namely that of being Voraciously Invested in Acquiring Riches* Incorporated (VIARI) [*verbal and/or promissory notes of franchise opportunities accepted as payment]. Lastly, I’m
    Relentlessly
    Ostentatious
    Through
    Heroic
    Feats of
    Undoubtedly
    Shoddy
    Spellings
    ,
    Predictably
    Lame;
    Zylophone

  26. Jenny Davis
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:05 AM | Permalink

    As Court Jester, I will gladly tackle important life questions such as, “Is the Pellet with the Poison in the Vessell with the Pestle, or the Flagon with the Dragon?” I have a long history of Making a Fool of Myself, and with my witty banter and ability to quote random movies, I have faith that I can help to ensure Life Couldn’t Possibly Better Be.

    • Josiah
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 11:31 AM | Permalink

      Points for referencing the best movie no one has ever seen.

      • Shannon
        Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:03 PM | Permalink

        Danny Kaye ftw!

  27. Justin Ramirez
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:14 AM | Permalink

    Ha. So I was reading a book and the particular topic happened to be order and chaos, while reading it I started to think of the blog not knowing that anything would be posted or what the topic would be. Looks like he needs some order so bad that he’s using telepathy haha. Someone get on this quick.

  28. Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:29 AM | Permalink

    I manage a team of 50+ employees, customers and their agency engineering contracts. This position involves a combination of HR, recruiting, sales and frequent contract negotiation.  I am not an engineer but have befriended them and found a way to learn new things to do this work for 10 years.  I am passionate about advocating for and recognizing employees,  writing and taking thorough notes typing 70+ WPM. 

    I am a huge fan who lives in Peoria,  IL and always cries a little bit inside when I see your postings for Stevens, WI. While I have experience managing employees remotely, working with Skype and Android phones mentioned in your posting, I imagine you would need someone local to carry out crucial face to face communication.  I am willing to travel up to 25% but not sure if this is enough.  As much as I wish I could convince my husband to leave,  I don’t think it is likely.  

    I greatly appreciate the opportunity you have offered to me (and others) to apply for an unlisted opening in the comments, if at least to be able to say I tried!

    By the way,  if you know any budding writers who are looking for this kind of thing in Peoria IL, I am open to side gigs and a chance to break into a new career. 

    • CancerKiller
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:27 PM | Permalink

      So cool to see a someone from my home town, Peoria, IL. And a Rothfussian to boot!

      I say ask the hubby if you are serious. You will never know if you don’t talk about it with him. Good luck!

      • Sarah Krieger
        Posted July 12, 2019 at 3:15 PM | Permalink

        Nice to meet you CancerKiller and thanks for the encouragement! How awesome to hear from a Peorian and Rothfussian. :) My husband has agreed to the 25% travel in the past and I did share the link to this with him. I suspect the position requires someone local, but it sounds like a great job!

  29. Maureen
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:41 AM | Permalink

    So I feel kind of stupid making this comment but my heart SANG when I saw this. This is AMAZING and I am SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!! Some of the weight will be off your shoulders!!!

    Side note: we are reading the Name of the Wind for a podcast I’m a part of RIGHT NOW (recording next week) and the guys LOVED it.

    Keep on doing good things Elodin Enterprises. We are all behind you.

  30. David
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:44 AM | Permalink

    My skill-set is much more musically focused than organizational, but if for whatever bizarre reason you’re in need of a board-certified music therapist to help your/your team in creatively developing some healthy coping skills for effective communication and dealing with stress (it’s a real thing!), then hit me up?

    In all seriousness, best of luck in finding a business manager. Always good to have someone take part of the stress off your shoulders.

  31. Tyler
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 10:57 AM | Permalink

    If you are in need of a mechanical engineer for some strange reason, then I will uproot my family and start on Monday.

    • Andy VH
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 4:21 PM | Permalink

      Honestly, I can’t think of a time where a mechE isn’t useful; thanks for doing the cool shit you do!

  32. J. J. Wolf
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 11:43 AM | Permalink

    I nominate Misery Chastain, she should an extraordinary ability to get writers to focus on writing.

  33. Jen
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:24 PM | Permalink

    I will be submitting my resume for the position, knowing that you’ll be receiving a lot of them and therefore getting it would be a long shot. That being said, I would also like to offer my services in helping to weed through the applications and aid in the hiring process.

  34. Gabe Kirchner
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:26 PM | Permalink

    You should consider someone who has worked running Democratic Statehouse/congressional campaigns in the Wisconsin hinterlands. Or someone with a union organizing background. These people are ninjas and can totally help you. They take pride in the work they do. Just thought I would add my two cents.

  35. Sarah Brannan
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:26 PM | Permalink

    This job is exactly in my wheelhouse, I have all of the applicable skills and am looking to move away from my corporate role into something more worthwhile, but I’m UK based. I’m guessing remote working wouldn’t work for you? Happy to travel over a few times a year but mostly work remotely?

    • Jóhanna Hlöðversdóttir
      Posted July 15, 2019 at 7:04 AM | Permalink

      Love this comment, wanted so say the same thing as I’m located in Iceland

  36. Jon
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:49 PM | Permalink

    I have a background in software development and currently lead a small team as application development manager. If you need someone with some leadership and management experience that knows software, that’s me. Also located in central Wisconsin, Waupaca.

  37. Posted July 12, 2019 at 12:58 PM | Permalink

    I hope you find the person you need! And hey, if you ever need a scenic designer or carpenter for some reason let me know.

  38. Jennifer
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 1:32 PM | Permalink

    Hate of snow vs. Love of organizing things/tough challenges/possibility to work with Pat and an amazing team/need for a job…..

    Does anyone know a more exact number on the “small team” size? 3-6 people it’s all good, 7 or more… not so much.

  39. Jack Jasilionis
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 1:42 PM | Permalink

    I know this is a long shot, and not a very glamorous inquiry, but I would honestly consider any Custodial Positions you might have available at any office locations! I have years of work doing custodial/maintenance work for my local school districts, as well as years of cleaning and other labor-intensive tasks through kitchen or bar work.

    Like I said, I know it’s not the most sought after position, but fancy Business Managers still make messes, and someone’s gotta clean it. Relocating wouldn’t be difficult, especially for a job opportunity like this.

  40. Kintay
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 2:31 PM | Permalink

    I’d like to apply for the position of part-time moral support. This can be done verbally, textually, via post or telepathically – never needing to actually make contact. I’m a great listener and give great high fives and hugs. Please show me a sign if this is meant to be.

    Yours,
    Kintay

  41. Ryan
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 2:55 PM | Permalink

    Alas I am not nearly qualified enough to apply for this position, nor am I eloquent enough to pull off saying “alas” non ironically, but that is beside the point. I am a college senior focusing on media production. I love screenwriting, videography, editing, directing, and the oxford comma. If you are in need of somebody to put together an advertisement for your company or Worldbuilders I’m your man. A small commercial to be played at the local theater before the big name movie trailers? Easy. A short and sweet social media video about Worldbuilders? No problem. A feature length documentary about a famous bearded writer? With pleasure. A film set in the world of Temerant sharing some of its stories? Gladly.

  42. Posted July 12, 2019 at 3:52 PM | Permalink

    Should you ever expand to the point of needing a similar position, but focusing on the IT side of the house, let us all know. I would be thrilled for that opportunity! As is, I am kicking myself for not having the Administration/Executive Assistant skills it looks like you are looking for.

    Best of luck Rothco.

    ~Nick

  43. Danyelle
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 5:03 PM | Permalink

    I have a Bachelors Degree in Business and Marketing. I also reside in Stevens Point. I will definitely be applying for this job. Thank you for posting!

  44. Posted July 12, 2019 at 5:52 PM | Permalink

    Not that it seems greatly needed, but I can volunteer to be Pediatrician On Call, especially of the late night variety. With coming up on 30 years experience taking care of kids, and now being in the PNW and thus 2 hours earlier than CST, a question coming at midnight your time is really no big deal.

    I’m told that I’m very reassuring, although every so often the right answer is “yeah, time to get in the car and go to the ER.” I’m ready to consult on matters medical, psychological, social or educational. I’ve recently been dragged into the transgender controversy, I do hope you don’t need advice on that topic. It’s so, so complicated.

    I’ve met Oot a couple of times, but years and years ago when I lived in Waunakee (and worked at Meriter Hospital). My most recent author child wrangling was Ash Gaiman, where I was one of many entertaining him at the Omega Institute.

  45. Thomas
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:11 PM | Permalink

    Good luck with you’re search! If you’re ever in need of Software Development or IT support in a remote fashion, give me a holler. I’ve also got management and general do-goodery experience.

  46. Lynne Everett
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:37 PM | Permalink

    Whilst I would love this job so much, I don’t think there’s any amount of money that could convince me to even enter the US right now, let alone live there. Not even for the chance to work with Pat. Sorry.
    That said however, I would love to apply for the job as Official Reviewer of Books Donated for the Lottery. My qualifications include: owning more books than my library has shelves for (which, considering I actually HAVE a library for the first time ever is a little scary); an eclectic taste in books (I own/have read at least one example of every genre except romance and Westerns (unless you count The Dark Tower as a Western)); the two biggest categories in my library are fantasy and science fiction; I possess a very fast reading/comprehension speed and a great memory. Most importantly I can read a book cover to cover and leave it looking new. No really.

  47. Lindsay
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:38 PM | Permalink

    I know this girl who would be great for this job! You’ll recognize her by the short skirt and looooong jacket.

    Qualifications
    -fast
    -thorough
    -sharp as a tack
    -able to tour the facility, picking up slack
    -gets up early/stays up late
    -uninterrupted prosperity
    -uses a machete to cut through red tape
    -fingernails that shine like justice
    -voice that is dark, like tinted glass

  48. Natasha
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 6:53 PM | Permalink

    I would like to apply for the position of random friend you text once a month at midnight. Thanks!

  49. Tobias
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:16 PM | Permalink

    What happened to the comment I just posted???? Do they get screened? This is a test comment

    • tobias
      Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:22 PM | Permalink

      Hm. Well. I tried to say lots of nice things, and curse out the haters so maybe it got censored. It was also very long…. Then I tried to take out the cursing and repost but I still don’t see it. Anyway, lots of nice things were said, Pat. And a heartfelt “thank you’. Could be my post is just being reviewed by the mods. Maybe it’ll now be up here twice, so double the fawning, flattering, drivel. Big love and appreciation. Hopefully you get to read the original post because I really wanted you to know how much I love your work.

  50. Tobias
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:19 PM | Permalink

    I was naive enough to think I’d be the first software engineer to post back…. SMH. So yeah anyway, degree in Computer Science from a top tier engineering university, got skills with all manner of tech… I’ve also operated my own independent production company so, recruiting and managing teams of 20-40 people. Deadlines, budgets, marketing, people skills, booking talent, booking venues, finding sponsors, shameless promo, etc.

    I’m also an astrologer which is probably what sets me apart as a candidate. For real. I’m currently working on an essay designed to convince more of my engineering buddies that its worth a second, more serious look.

    Mostly I’m a fan who’s considered posting to this blog for years but never has. I love to write. I could strangle every duckhead and dipslit that gives you a hard time about your release schedule. Reading your writing makes me a better writer. It makes me a more eloquent speaker. These are both qualities I prize highly, and value deeply. I’m the appropriate age to have been waiting for my letter from Hogwarts around the time Prisoner from Azkaban came out… Though I devoured the book, I was the 15 year old kid who hated on the series because I thought the writing was boring and the story lamely structured. Though I love GRRM as an overall story teller, his delivery sucks, imho. It’s like reading goosebumps. I’m the guy who when you say you have to consciously keep yourself from doing things just for beauty’s sake, I wring my hands and lament that the whole book isn’t written the way the prologue is. (I’m the dude who got marked off in AP Lit for “too much ‘show-dont-tell'” on the show-don’t-tell writing assignment). Not to say that the rest of the writing in the books isn’t perfect. It is.
    Your writing is beyond critique, even for me. Stylistically, structurally, etc. And the story is so incredible. I cry through the first half of NoTW every time. Not like sniffles. I legitimately sob; and hardest when Auri comes to find Kvothe in his room above Anker’s.

    It’s just SO GOOD. So good that capitals aren’t big enough. Your work hits me in all the right feels and inspires me in so many ways. I grew up on the Earthsea saga and Anne McCaffery. Howard Pyle. Tolkein and Lewis go without saying of course. Anyway, I digress. When I read your books, its like a beautiful song. Poetic. Profound. Just the right amount of philosophy with the perfect dose of science. So yeah. One big word vomit of a handful of things I’ve wanted to say to you for many years. Mostly just, “thank you”.

  51. Richard F Aronson
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 7:44 PM | Permalink

    I have been a GM since 1978 and a professional game designer since 1992, with emphasis on RPG systems and behavioral systems (which most folks call AI, but it really isn’t). But most people just know me as the author of “Eric and the Gazebo”.

    I’m mostly retired these days but can contribute some time and expertise to the various game related projects you keep mentioning. Game system design and balancing really matters for online worlds. You don’t want everyone to be Kvothe (actually, you probably don’t want anyone to be Kvothe aside from you or some other employee) but you want everyone to feel that maybe someday with a lot of luck Kvothe might buy them a drink or ask for their help in the game world.

    I don’t know if you have or need a game system designer, or plan to do it yourself. But even if you just want an impartial observer to review system design documents and make suggestions before too much money gets poorly spent on development, I’m sorta kinda volunteering. Playing computer games, catching up on books, movies, and TV shows, and chauffeuring the spouse are fun but starting to pall.

  52. Lance Wallace
    Posted July 12, 2019 at 11:11 PM | Permalink

    That artwork was so good that I had to make a comment about it. Good to see you back, Pat.

  53. Mikael
    Posted July 13, 2019 at 3:52 AM | Permalink

    Have goat, will travel.

  54. Danielle
    Posted July 13, 2019 at 8:47 AM | Permalink

    I wish I lived in US right now :(
    And I do love goats 🐐
    Hope you find the best person for the role 👍

  55. Josh
    Posted July 13, 2019 at 4:17 PM | Permalink

    Congrats on this decision! Reading the first part of your post, I thought “Gawd, this guy needs a bigger support team”…so it was nice to read that you thought so, too!

    The description of your day sounded incredibly familiar. I think anyone who’s worked in an under-resourced (be it $ or people resources) org knows that feeling. So from someone who’s been there, a small piece of friendly advice: delegate the minutiae of this hiring process to others (even if it is a temp agency, recruiter service, etc.), leaving you free to simply meet folks and decide! Hope you find someone who can streamline work and is fluent in “No” and other boundaries. ;) (I was going to say “a level 4 Gatekeeper” but that just seems too much even for this crowd!)

    Best of luck!

  56. Jean-Christophe Desrosiers
    Posted July 13, 2019 at 9:44 PM | Permalink

    Is this the book cover for the french version of the door of stone?
    Anyway it looks amazing!!!

  57. Jeff Vera
    Posted July 13, 2019 at 11:57 PM | Permalink

    With the broad set of skills all those duties require you should be looking to hire two or three people, not one magical candidate that has expertise in three very different fields.

  58. Posted July 14, 2019 at 1:22 AM | Permalink

    Hey Pat,

    Before you run off hiring someone have you documented your current process with your existing employees? Like made flow charts, colored them in, and created a linked in solutions to common problems? My guess is that if you flow chart everything out and do a bit of research into finding solutions for your most time intensive, critical, or odious processes and task you’ll find solutions that are less expensive than a new employee, shift existing work around to make existing employees happier, and improve your nimbleness. You might still need an employee but this should help narrow down what the candidate needs and help you find the right talent

    But just like others have pointed out your posting is too vague, looking for too disperse a skill set, and doesn’t list salary which is absolutely key for attracting the right talent. But if you are looking for someone like that look for individuals who were temps. Get someone who’s worked at least 3 and 4 years as a temp in AP, AR, Purchasing, Data Entry, Office Assistant, Data Analyst, to name a few. They often get tasked to various projects on these assignments that aren’t directly related to their role and should have those soft skills that are so difficult to find.

    Hope that helps and good luck!

  59. Brian
    Posted July 14, 2019 at 5:26 AM | Permalink

    Are you in need of a personal nurse to check your blood pressure before those stress inducing board meetings or tell you what snacks you can’t eat at your next tabletop game? We can’t have you passing on before you have a chance to write another 4 more books, right?

  60. K
    Posted July 14, 2019 at 1:34 PM | Permalink

    Hi. You shouldn’t hire me. It would be a mistake. You probably want people who have skills that can improve your life. That’s not me. I used to think differently on the matter. I had everything I ever wanted, but didn’t know it.. Id say I lost it but that wouldn’t be quite accurate. In my own uniquely ignorant and grandiose fashion I totally and royally fucked it up beyond repair. All I have left is my very own failing business in a backwater town, which, by the way, I’ll be leaving for good in the next 24 hours. Which brings me to this. I have the answer to question that’s been bothering you and enough self loathing and rage to answer it without breaking before I’m through. I require nothing from you. Just someone to remember I did this.

    • Max
      Posted July 15, 2019 at 3:24 AM | Permalink

      Hi K!

      I don’t know what you’re going through, but I just want you to know, if you need someone to keep talking with you, I’m here!

      • James Weaver
        Posted July 15, 2019 at 9:50 AM | Permalink

        If this is a genuine description of what they are feeling, absolutely yes, we must listen and offer help.

        But at the same time, I read this and can’t help but see the parallels between this and Kvothe at the Waystone in. This very much could be Kote’s inner monologue, except where the business is failing. Especially with the pseudonym ‘K’.

  61. Lucy
    Posted July 14, 2019 at 2:17 PM | Permalink

    I think this’ll be a really good thing in your life :)

  62. Jason
    Posted July 14, 2019 at 5:48 PM | Permalink

    Sounds like Elodin Enterprises is experiencing explosive growth and that causes chaos. This though overwhelming, is great news. Congratulations on success! From what I can see there are really at least three job roles embedded here. Perhaps not all full time, or even onsite, but each has it’s own set of special set of skills. Here is how I would imagine you could structure it all. I’d love to be a fly on the wall at the staff meeting coming from this group…

    Personal Assistant : manages emails, appointments, organizes the chaos and runs errands. Needs to be single point of contacts for entire schedule. This person is most visible to folks inside and outside the org so great communication skills and amazing attitude is essential. Mary Poppins is a good candidate. This role must be onsite.

    Production Director : manages all production projects, tracks deliverable and assets. This can be remote. As Eloden Enterprises grows there could be more than one production director. Each asset, book, TV Show and Movie has hundreds of details that need to be tracked. This requires experience of industry and formal project management certifications. Someone who be organized at this level has a specific skill set with it’s own set of project management tools. It is essential that this person can work well with author’s creative nomenclature, work style and communicate with outside partners. This role can be remote.

    Business Manager : Reviews contracts, negotiations, accounts, manages accountants. You need a highly competent, experienced and trustworthy person in this role. But since this involves negotiations, this role should also be your bad cop for hire. They have your back. The hard call on where you spend our ‘extra’ time as well as working on contracts with publishers and studios might not be the best job for Mary Poppins. That is your assistant, the business manager is more of a Consigliere. This role can be remote, if they are willing to drop in for meetings at a predefined cadence.

    Sure you and your staff have had some of these ideas too, but perhaps it helps clarify a way to go.

    Good Luck!

    • Jason
      Posted July 14, 2019 at 5:59 PM | Permalink

      One last thought, also need a volunteer coordinator if you don’t already have one…

    • Posted July 15, 2019 at 8:14 AM | Permalink

      Agreed. I think the position is encompassing far too much for just one position, and the likelihood of finding One Person that will actually meet all of those expectations is slim to none (or extremely expensive, in the multiple-six-figures zone). Not that that’s bad, but that is one very expensive person for a small business.

      And they do have a volunteer coordinator, at least of some sort. Someone on the team does manage that regularly already. Whether or not they would shuffle it to the new position or not, who knows, but it’s already being managed by someone Not Pat.

  63. Sean Lowery
    Posted July 14, 2019 at 9:02 PM | Permalink

    Just here to say that art is fucking amazing, and I’d love to work with you but doubt you’d need a second chaos generator.

  64. Posted July 15, 2019 at 3:04 AM | Permalink

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  65. Julian
    Posted July 15, 2019 at 6:24 AM | Permalink

    Such a great post. Love the artwork for the book! Would love to help out, but unfortunately I am based in the EU and am bound here by obligations….. I am sure you will find a mighty fine person for the job! You might be a chaos generator like Elodin and Kvothe, but I am sure you will find a capable Auri or Leslie Knope to run your business and give your spirit the space and peace it needs to be tranquil and ingeniously prolific.
    Carry on and be yourself as much as possible!

    I’ll see you where the roads meet.

  66. Joe D
    Posted July 15, 2019 at 7:01 AM | Permalink

    I love that you are so willing to use any means necessary to find the best talent. I am a professional life and leadership coach. That means I help people set and accomplish goals, better themselves, and solve problems from a holistic perspective. I would love to work with you, Pat, and anyone on your team. My primary areas are non-profits, teams, and individuals.

    Keep doing your great work!

    Joe

  67. Malka
    Posted July 15, 2019 at 7:19 AM | Permalink
  68. Jefferson
    Posted July 15, 2019 at 12:38 PM | Permalink

    This post made me so happy! Good work team biting the bullet!

    I don’t have a good person in mind for the job but I have a recommendation for an awesome management philosophy book that seems relevant, has helped me a lot personally. It’s called Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg Mckeown. The TLDR version is: learn to say no to as many things as you can, and it will free you to say yes to the thing you care about the most.

    I wish you all the best in this process! Love your work Mr. Rothfuss.

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